cherrymonstar

2006-11-26T00:00:00.000+08:00

im starting to hate dis blogskin.
im starting to hate blogger.

2006-11-17T23:15:00.000+08:00

You've Changed 60% in 10 Years

You've done a good job changing with the times, but deep down, you're still the same person.You're clothes, job, and friends may have changed some - but it hasn't changed you.

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

You Are a Drama Princess (or Prince)

You're not over the top dramatic, but you have your moments.
You know how to steal the spotlight...
And how to act out to get your way.

People around you know that you're good for a laugh.
But at times, your drama gets a bit too much for everyone.
Tone it down a tad, and you'll still be the center of attention.

Are You a Drama Queen (or King)?

random.

2006-11-15T22:09:00.000+08:00

wow.

dis is good.

to all guys.

When a girl misses u, she's afraid to see how your new girl looks, she's dreading the fact that ure not hers any more.

When u break a girls heart, she still feels it when bumping heads 3 years later.

When a girl just stares deep into your eyes, she's HOPING that you're hers and only hers (it shows how much she cares: eyes never lie).

When a girl is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind.

When a girl is not arguing,she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around.

When a girl answers, "I'm fine, " after a few seconds,she is not at all fine.

When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are so wonderful.

When a girl lays her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a girl calls you everyday, she is seeking for your attention.

When a girl wants to see you everyday, she wants to be pampered.

When a girl says, "I'll love you forever, "she means it.

When a girl says that she can't live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future.

When a girl says, "I miss you, "no one in this world can miss you more than that.

dats it man.

it is so true.

anyways.

i dunno why the hell i went to all de trouble to post dis.

when i dun think ders any guys who actually reads my blog.

hah.

ok whatever ah.

dis just sum random entry.

wheee.

got date tmrw.

with my scandal!

muahahhahahhaha.

peace.

2006-11-13T05:17:00.000+08:00

sad sad sad.

75% of de show i cried watching it.

haiz.

peace.

heart.

2006-11-13T03:40:00.000+08:00

my god.

was watching heart just now.

den banjir.

as expected.

niwaes.

it hit me.

the story soooooo suits my situation rite now.

gosh.

i like dis guy fren but dis guy likes another girl.

dats all i can say ah for now.

but i tell u, seriously the story is sooooo freakin similar like mine.

dang.

whatever ah.

but i dunno if i'd go dat far for dem ah.

hehs.

eh.

i dun like dat luna girl.

so ugly n cacat.

abeh hero de pon tk best.

tk turn me on langsong.

heh.

kau.

ape seh.

guy over best fren.

wth.

bodoh ah si hero nye.

haiyah.

oklah.

whatever lah.

its just a show.

heh.

wheee.

dah kol 4!

im watching another show now.

daaaa.

peace.

damn shagged.

2006-11-13T01:27:00.000+08:00

haiz.

damn shagged nowadays.

hope tmrw wont be much of a long day.

...

yesterday went to azfar's open house.

before dat me n nut was kinda aimless.

cos we planned to go to school for de badminton thingy.

but finally decided not to cos it was about to end niwaes.

so me and my big mouth suggested going to tamp mall lepak ah den maybe just meet bad der.

but when we wanted to alight it was raining.

so den we got caught in de rain.

stuck at a bustop.

wth.

eh.

noe wat.

im too lazy to story.

todae's nina's burfdae.

went to her house.

kecoh2 kan.

hehs.

dats all.

daaaa.

peace.

shagged.

2006-11-12T01:08:00.000+08:00

damn shagged.

not gonna update anything anytime soon.

maybe tmrw.

just maybe.

wth ah.

k go.

peace.

change

2006-11-05T16:12:00.000+08:00

wanna change my skin.

looking for sumthing simple.

hmmm.

boring

2006-10-31T10:59:00.000+08:00

ok.

last post b4 i get ready for sch.

finally i finished off ep2.8.

now all i hafta do is wait for dem to air de next episode at fox, and den i can watch it.

but eh.

season2 mcm tk best sgt ah.

dunno why.

too many politics ah.

but its still good.

yah.

niwaes.

i dnno what to wear.

shit.

cant wait to go to school.

dunno why.

but.

mcm malas pon ade.

lol.

dah ah.

nk gi siap ah.

no mood to smangat todae.

penat seh.

dunno whats gonna happen later.

i hafta quit dis act u noe.

lol.

oh btw.

remember i told u, i found new love.

haha.

yah.

so as i promised, i bring it up again after a few posts.

well.

he's all good.

and i said der was oni one flaw rite?

heh.

well.

i dunno.

cant share it at the moment.

just dat.

he's almost perfect.

and gd dad even my dad noes him already.

and he likes him.

i dunno.

who doesnt?

peace.

pissed.

2006-10-30T23:36:00.000+08:00

gosh.

todae was like de PRISON BREAK day.

talking bt it de WHOLE day.

god.

end up tiring myself too much.

wats wif de laptop on one hand.

gosh.

niwaes.

did sum shopping todae.

actually not really.

just bought stuff dat i needed.

heh.

like de lappy cover, sum stationaries.

and also a shirt.

but its a lil big.

L's too small.

XL's too big.

haiz.

so i hafta alter it myself.

oh well.

niwaes.

was just bloghopping just now.

everyone nowadays seems to be in love.

hah.

wth.

just fyi, im no longer one of dem ok.

i dunno what happened.

...

TO YOU:

why?

dats de first to de string of qns dat i haf.

lots of qns.

i nd answers.

but i noe im not getting any.

just getting my hopes high der.

still.

im just confused n disappointed.

wth did i do?

was it sumthing i said?

why get me in deeper in de first place?

since ders no answers, i assume.

and i just haf dis to say.

u are no better den dose guys out der.

dis was what i was afraid of in de first place.

i dunno what ur motive was also.

all i noe is dat ure just full of crappy sweet words.

which is so not surprising to me nimore by now.

heh.

and guys.

do not ever try to deny and argue with me when i say dis.

guys are all de same.

in one way or another.

whatever ah.

just too darn tired n sleepy to think bout dis.

just fyi, i didnt really break.

i wonder why.

maybe cos im immuned to it already.

maybe cos i kinda guessed dat dis was cumin and i managed to get prepared b4 it really came to me.

whatever it is.

im still in one piece.

hehs.

dreams.

2006-10-29T22:02:00.000+08:00

hah.
just wanted to share sumthing with u all.
altho it may be unneccessary info to u all ah.
haha.
recently, ive been having strange dreams.
heh.
last thurs or wed, de day i found out i had de first disease, i had a dream.
in de dream, i was also sick.
suffering from what i am suffering rite now.
"tompok" ni ah.
but oni thing in dis dream is dat i was really really sick.
i was dying.
and all i cud remember was my last few days in dis world, spent at a hospital.
and surrounding me, were all my frens.
hah.
weird.
den de next day, i dreamt dat i was a smoker.
there were 3 of us.
me, wak, and i dunno who.
nina or faz.
i cant remember.
we were window shopping sumwhere.
den wak took out a cigg.
and i snatched it away from him.
both he n de other person were shocked as hell.
and den, i smoked dat cigg.
dey just looked.
actually, wak took it out for himself.
he also dah jinak2kan diri nk smoke.
but in de end, dey just stared at me in disbelief.
i was sucking it in.
and i remember it as a very awful experience.
not at all pleasant.
it was choking.
like very pekat.
and i kinda forced myself to smoke dat thing.
actually i didnt want to.
but i felt like i hadta show wak n de other person dat im "cool".
just because im smoking.
lol.
wth kan.
and den, this morning.
slept at 3.30am.
had a dream.
i was an inmate.
lol.

and i got tattoos all over my body.
all bcos of pb.
i think im going haywire.
lol.
oh well.
peace.

...

2006-10-29T19:48:00.000+08:00

heh.
on de last episode of season1.
god.
so clossseeeee.
haiz.
niwaes.
this show is good u noe.
well, besides de storyline dat is.
one thing, it improves my english.
and second, it makes my brain think.
it really does improve my eng u noe.
ive since started talking like dem.
lol.
think its driving a.adzil, slenger n bacin crazy.
lol.
whatever seh.
haha.
i assume many girls wud die to be with him.
but me.
i'd rather be him den be with him.
admire him.
heh.
i noe im living in a fantasy world.
haha.
so absorbed in dis rite now.
all i ever think about nowadays.
haha.
but den again, i think its better if i live in my dream world instead.
cos i get to decide wat happens next.
unlike reality.
im helpless.
just going with de flow.
even as much as i try to do sumthing, i can only do as much.
heh.
oh well.
sorry got carried away for abit der.
niwaes.
i move on fast.
have a new love rite now.
all's good.
educated, good-looking.
only one problem.
heh.
i'll update soon.
peace.

fcuk u.

2006-10-29T01:12:00.000+08:00

im done with myspace.

get out of my life.

peace.

pbpbpbpbpbpb.

2006-10-28T23:14:00.000+08:00

hadta help out uncle todae.

was reluctant yesterday.

but todae was ok.

cos got money.

ehem2.

lol.

anyways, woke up at 6.15am dis mornin.

heard dem go off dy.

its ok.

decided to go myself niwaes.

well, was kinda surprised i woke up.

was about to go back to sleep actually, den remembered.

haha.

u noe wat, i actually had 12hrs of sleep dat nite.

on fri, reached home at 5 plus ptg.

masok bilik, tgk katil, baring, tros tetido.

hahaha.

all de way tido til de next morning.

siak eh.

all because i was awake 33hrs de day before which was thursday ah.

doing what?

watching prison break.

lol.

wth ah.

oh yah.

told u i have a disease rite?

now i have 2.

one of dem is dis addiction.

heh.

even when i was out at wak ali's house just now, my mind couldnt stop playing back de scenes of de episodes.

and keep on thinking what cud possibly happen next.

now im at ep1.16.

yea.

if im not wrong ah.

serious seh.

addicted giler.

now kpale dah pening.

i think cos of all de staring at the lappy/comp in de dark.

haiz.

de shows good btw.

brings all kinds of emotions to u.

a specialty is de climaxing part ah.

obviously.

makes u sit at de edge of ur chair.

hahaha.

dah ah.

im like writing a movie review.

lol.

yah.

so its like 33hrs of non-sleep, and den 12hrs of sleep straight.

and today, i dun think im sleeping.

oh!

and faz!

dat was de reason why i didnt pick up ur calls dat day.

fone was in my room, i was outside.

didnt visit my fone til like 3 plus.

cos i didnt think dat anyone wud call me .

oh well.

senang2 call lagik k.

hahaha.

gosh.

headache man.

oklah.

cant type much.

nd to wash up, and den.

back to de story!!

hehehe.

daaaaaaa.

peace.

2006-10-27T02:15:00.000+08:00

wahahahhahahaha.

pathway to hell.

lol.

nicenice.

2006-10-27T01:04:00.000+08:00

heh.

sch's been fun.

if not distracting, at least.

good dat it has taken my mind off stuff.

arts app lec was great.

ashik was fun.

wahahhahaha.

got a feeling we gonna be close dis sem.

haha.

niwaes.

summarise todae.

was great.

was at the east gate bustop with ashik.

waiting for 23.

den this bus cums along.

8 i think.

haha.

and one ~~cute~~ guy was sitting at de last row, bottom deck.

i was looking at him.

dunno wat my expression was, cos when he looked at me, he gave a small smile.

heee.

like first time seh ~~cute~~ guy smile at me pat luar.

nyeahahahha.

was beaming all de way.

lol.

btw, im starting prison break all over again from ep1.1.

coolness shit.

yah.

so.

3 things dat made my day today.

nina's company+COMPLIMENT, dat bus guy and prison break.

heee.

addicted to it.

oh.

btw, i have a disease.

dun cum near me.

aku berpenyakit!

pembawa disease.

dan kamu.

pembawa siaL.

hehs.

peace.

equation

2006-10-26T01:53:00.000+08:00

confused.

hurt.

pissed.

add dem all up together, and u get:

ME.

peace.

cepat cepat.

2006-10-25T22:37:00.000+08:00

i think i might need to change to a new blog.

heh.

anyways, faz.

quickly meet me up.

before my hair grows long.

dats all ah.

malas nk cite2 bnyk2 psl isi hatiku.

tk gune.

dey cannot help me.

no one can help me, except myself.

anything, i'll update u by mouth.

peace.

fcuking myspacey kids.

2006-10-25T21:26:00.000+08:00

i hate myspace.

actually no, i just hate de KIDS in der.

ckp ngan drg, diam2 sdah eh.

pissed.

help me.

2006-10-23T00:05:00.000+08:00

i dun like dis feeling.

tahan. tahan. tahan.

im afraid i cant hold on for long.

help.

someone.

peace.

damn freakin pissed.

2006-10-21T23:23:00.000+08:00

here's a post to the public.

please stop making halimaton shahidah feel so low n down bt herself.

what do u actually get when u say bad things bt her to her?

dats one thing i really wanna noe.

do u actually get excited, after telling me dat im fat, and ugly?

yesterday, my frens.

todae, my family.

tmrw, my husband?

was in de car just now.

bacin was again, insulting me and telling me how fat i was.

i was soooooooooooooooooooooo pissed, dat i felt like smashing his head against de side window.

really!

i almost did dat!

urggghhhhh!!!!

he and dad always making me feel down and low bt myself.

and den mum.

and den slenger.

wtf?!

what de hell do dey get when dey say all dose nasty things?!?!!!

piker klakar ape?!

COME ON LAH.

IM FAT, AND I CAN SEE DAT.

SO I DUN NEED U PPL TO RUIN MY LIFE AND TELL ME AGAIN N AGAIN DAT I AM.

I CAN SO FUCKIN SEE DAT FOR MYSELF.

URE JUST WASTING UR BREATH AND ENERGY TELLING ME DAT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

KAU RASE HAPPY SGT KUTOK AKU GINI??

u noe.

seriously.

if by de end of next yr, der isnt a day where im not being told dat im fat, i think im gonna kill myself.

im just sooooo sick n tired dy lah of ppl telling me dat im big and fat.

mule2 aku diam diri.

makin aku diam diri, makin menjadi2.

first it was deedeal.

den nasrul.

den my family.

den now?

my 2 bestfrens too???

wth.

im so disappointed n hurt ah.

and now dat ive mentioned dis, dun fucking tell me dat i shudnt take things seriously n dat u ppl are just joking ah.

nk joke tgk tempat ah.

wth.

pls ah.

just do me one fuckin favour.

pls keep ur bad comments to urself.

i dun need it.

peace/pissed.

updates.

2006-10-21T21:22:00.000+08:00

been a few days since i updated.

grown dependant on blogger since i made dat many-many-entries-on-one-day entry.

haiz.

cleaned my room on tues and wed.

went to jb on thurs.

THURSDAY:

met ibu, after so long.

been few months since i last saw her.

terok eh anak gini.

haiz.

but i did had fun with her.

we were breaking fast at sum gerai tepi jalan.

den dah mkn2 sume, i think she was full dy ah.

hahahha.

den like small kid seh she.

haha.

alih2 she say out, "eh, ibu mcm nk muntah ah..."

wahliao.

she was done eating, but i wasnt.

den she made gagging sounds.

kauuuu.

tk senonoh seh.

hahaha.

den i was like ish stop it sehhhh, org tgh makan sehhh.

den she say, "ish. ibu klau nk muntah, ibu berdiri tros muntah! pastu, jolok2 lagi kai sudu!"

wahliaooo.

tu part i literally laffed out loud together with de food in my mouth.

hahahha.

i really cant imagine my own mother doing dat seh!!

den i say, "hahaha! kauuu. klau ibu gitu, org lari dulu seh."

seriously.

imagine if she were to do dat, den org sume tgk.

wahahaahhaha.

ok nemind, inside joke.

anyways, after dat went to angsana.

bleargh.

boring.

saw nice vans shoes.

but, heh.

muka ibu nk belikan barang2 gitu.

muke ibu nk belikan barang2. fullstop.

heh.

den mrajok kejap.

but malas ah nk mrajok, cos...

alah.

whatever.

anyways.

saw timon n linda n tepo at angsana.

selling lekor.

hehehe.

de lekor at jb is damn nice.

so lembut.

so very unlike de lekors here.

mcm ubi kayu.

bleargh.

and saw si sani hussein also.

if im not wrong dats de name ah.

yg act cite soldadu.

now he's into arts n producing n i dunno wat ah.

but as usual, i dun like to stare at dem, and make dem think dat dey are damn popular and well-known, so i didnt look at him much.

ah.

after dat.

went to danga bay, rumah limas.

go meet abang.

heh.

den saw gajah, epul and sinta!

hahaha.

sinta.

the love of his life rite now.

but dunno if dey're together dy anot.

whatever ah.

den went back.

azim was home.

btw, azim is asyQee's fren, my now, abg angkat.

since when my mum angkat him also i dunno.

tot wanted to wait up for asyQee, so he can bring jalan2.

but den i tot.

tkpelah, takot jadi like de last time we went lepaking together.

ish.

and niwaes, i knew de next day wud be along day for me.

and it really was.

FRIDAY:

janji ngan min kol 1 at yck.

so woke up at 10 plus.

siap by 11.30.

but ibu sengaje lambat2 kan diri.

i was so damn pissed at her.

she purposely deelee-darleed.

urgh.

she didnt want me to go back so early.

wanted me to stay der longer and help her clean de house.

and i so hate cleaning dat house.

mcm2 binatang yg akan kluar.

lipas, cicak, spyder, tikus, semut.

sume kluar.

kucing pon ade.

ayam pon ade.

heh.

anyways.

finally, left de house ard 12.15.

tu pon after i make noise.

heh.

and with the car's aircon not werking, i was perspiring all de way to larkin.

and so so damn pissed by dat time.

was like frowning de whole journey der.
it was 12.30 by de time i took de bus.

and reached wdlands ard 1.30.

met min at bns ard 1.45.

and she told me de news.

dat beep couldnt meet us rite after werk.

dat she got meeting, and can oni meet us after buke.

wahliao.

wth ah.

so it was like 6hours of waiting for her.

6 damn freaking hours u noe!

so we became some homeless children, roaming de streets of city hall.

was really2 bored with no idea where to go and what to do.

finally we went to marina, and sat at sum bench, taking pictures.

after dat, ard 4 plus, we decided to break fast at beach rd(the final product).

and i hadta give de SMART idea to walk from ct hall to beach rd.

smart abes.

furthermore, neither of us knew where we were going.

so we just walked following de direction of my instinct.

and finally i managed to see parkview sq.

heh.

so we walked and walked til we FINALLY reached bugis.

den dah, lost again.

dunno how to walk from bugis to beach rd.

i forgot how dat time we walked ah.

shit.

den menyempat kite stop jap, tgk map.

kental kan!!!

wahliao.

tkleh angkat seh.

i feel so lame ah dat day.

especially after spending near a day with mean.

nyeahhahaahahaha!

heh.

finally hajat kite nk berbuka di beach rd terpakse dibatalkan.

and we ate at zam2 instead.

wahliao.

melampau.

shud haf just shared one dish.

urgh.

after dat met beep.

at ct hall.

and again, we were forced to ask de qn of de day "nk gi mane ni??"

and again.

aku peh pandai, gi suggest going to town.

haiz.

and i really wasnt in de mood dy, by den.

really.

beep n mean make sum PRETTY BIG jokes bt me.

thinking dat it was funny, when it really wasnt.

really.

tkpelah.

bdae de baru lepas.

kasi lah die bahagia.

but it really wasnt funny at all to me.

haiz.

im so sick n tried of ppl giving me dat.

anyways.

yah.

and to make things worse, i was incontactable.

batt hp was flat.

argh.

hp tk charge, ipod tk charge.

arrrggghhhh.

so left for home ard 10.

dey walked to my bustop n masing2 naek bus

took pics all de way mcm bdk2 belo.

hmm.

but by den i wasnt in de mood and i was damn tired and all i wanted to do was get home asap, charge my fone n lie on my bed.

haiz.

and it was pretty much wat i did.

only, i took a bathe and checked my timetable before lying on my bed.

but too bad, didnt get to talk also dat nite.

TODAE/SATURDAY:

went to dp at suntec.

bought the 26dollars jeans i wanted to get.

slenger n bacin bought tees from topshop.

oh yah.

saw faizal mtn, idris n fahmy der!

hahaha.

fancy meeting dem der.

oh well.

and also went to body shop's exhibiton sale at suntec's hall 4.

wahahahahhahaa.

mum said, "get what u want."

heh.

ape lagi.

i bought a bag full of make up.

heee.

sum of dem i dun really need.

most of dem i never tried before.

and most of dem being bronzers n stuff.

slenger bought sum stuff too.

wth seh.

tk lame lagi seh deiktu.

niwaes.

heh.

stuff happened today dat im just too lazy to update.

haiz.

next entry!

peace.

broken.

2006-10-18T21:48:00.000+08:00

*paste*

i was broken.

peace.

bored seh.

2006-10-18T14:50:00.000+08:00

i just realised dat orang2 yg smangat nk tukar2 font when updating blogs or whatever, adalah orang2 yg btol2 tkde keje.

argh.

aku lah salah satu orang tu.

sampai 6 kali update satu hari.

i was damn bored.

couldnt sleep.

bed was full of stuff, how to sleep?!

tkde selera seh.

den dis morning, after sahur, on the lappy again.

update blog again.

but i couldnt take it nimore.

took my pillow, wore my biggg sweater,took my blanket and laid on de floor.

heh.

it was cold seh.

and i slept soundly.

until ten plus, continued sleeping.

woke up at 2 upon receiving a msg from llama.

den daddy knocked on de door.

kuat plak tu.

ish.

memekak btol.

den die noisy2 cos tk abes2 kemas, and sumore aircon on de whole day since yesterday.

heh.

arrrggghhhh!

so now, blom mandi lagi, dah on lappy, tk tau kol rape nk start kemas.

ish.

i am such a lazy gerl.

haiyah.

oh well.

i think i really hafta get going.

need to finish cleaning today seh.

if not tmrw2 cannot go out ah.

haiz.

ok go!

smangat tone!!!

...

bleargh.

peace.

check it out.

2006-10-18T06:06:00.000+08:00

50 things to think about.

1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count.

2. Real men drive stick shift.

3. I will leave if you lie.

4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).
5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.

7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.

8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you.

9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.

10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.

11. I expect you to call me.

12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants.

13. I'm scared of losing my independence.

14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.)

17. If I'm not having sex with you, I'm... a. ...having a fat day. b. ...not feeling "connected" to you. c. ...blackmailing you to get something I want.

18. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not.

19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I'm not afraid to use it.

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we're just going to the movies.

22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.

23. You should never tell me what to do.

24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.

25. My breasts love much licking and sucking.

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes.

27. I'm very impressed when you ask for my advice.

28. I'm unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead.

29. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

30. I want to be Madonna.

31. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers.

32. I'm in heaven when you hold my hand.

33. You're sexy when you're shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.

34. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving.

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you--and for you to recognize this.

37. If I'm not feeling loved, I will start looking....

38. Discussion of ex-gf's and ex-bf's should be avoided at all times.

39. I like it when you tell me what you're thinking, even if you don't know yourself.

40. Celebrating our anniversary, even if it's only been a few months, earns major bonus points.

41. I love it when you're sweaty.

42. It's best to consult your gal pals for gift ideas.

43. A lady should always be greeted with kisses.

44. I like porn.

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands.

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

47. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want me to see, hear, read...

48. For the record: I'd rather you break up with me than cheat.

49. I remember everything about our relationship.

50. You should know all this and more with-out my telling you.

and so i especially would like to point out these points:

no 6. (in dis case, "i wud like it if...u do dat.")

no 32. honestly. seriously. truly.

no 34. yes. so pls do us de favour.

no 36. well, which girl doesn't??

no 48. last but not least.

i'll try.

2006-10-18T04:34:00.000+08:00

was talkin to nina over on msn.

heh.

she gave me a few advices.

yah.

exactly.

nina giving advices to ppl.

susah dpt tu.

so, its...

jgn bbual2 kuat sangat.

jgn mrajok kuat sangat.

and jgn gemok sgt kan.

ah yelah.

i'll bear dat in mind.

oh yah.

and jgn asek nk take je.

i assure u i'll try my best to make this happen.

i hope im not dancing tango alone.

im missing u.

peace.

dun leave.

2006-10-18T02:28:00.000+08:00

arrrrrrrggggggggghghhhhhhhhhh.

imissuimissuimissuimissuimissu!!!

wow.

2006-10-18T00:27:00.000+08:00

oh.

i forgot to mention.

he looked good dat day.

i was meltin de whole time.

love.

double fast.

2006-10-18T00:01:00.000+08:00

todae im double fasting.
for de past 24 hrs, saya tidak mengucapkan kata-kata sayang kepada mu.
kata *muacks*, or sayang or dear, tidak kluar dari bibir atau di sms-sms ku.
heee.
dun ask why.
peace.

updates.

2006-10-17T20:32:00.000+08:00

heys.

wth seh.

pissed off siak aku bbual ngan deikni.

si soephian ni.

btw, he's my ex-boyfren, ex-fren.

haha.

all bcos of one girl.

at one point of time, i used to be close to him.

dat was after we broke up ah.

i wud tell him hu im going out wif nowadays, share problems and all.

den he started seeing dis girl.

he told me alot bt her.

den suddenly sumhow we stopped contactin.

dat was thru fone n sms ah.

den in msn pon seems like semakin jarang ah bbual.

den as months passed, it came to a point where we stopped contactin totally.

tk tegor pon in msn.

dis was like ard early dis yr.

or march.

i dunno ah.

den ape ntah, like until recently, suddenly he tegor in msn.

tu pon not dat recent ah.

like 2 months ago or wat.

den alih2 de tegor, and asked how i was and all.

den ape ntah, he told me he and his gf fought bcos of me.

like wtf kan.

we never even contact or whatsoever.

he told me, she got mad bcos my no was in his hp.

wtf?!

den aku dah biseng2 ah pat deikni, tell him ah dat his gf is being ridiculous.

i asked him to tell her dat we havent been contactin for so long dy.

den he said he did try.

but de gf was like "i cant forget how manja2 u guys used to be".

whahhahahahahha.

big joke der.

firstly, as far as i can remember, i never was manja wif him.

really.

never.

hello, i was wif him for oni like wat seh, 2 wks??

ah.

and he was one of dose non-serious ones.

yea.

dats first thing, i was never even manja when i was wif him.

and, second thing, i was wif him even before she met him!

im his ex, for gods sake!!

even as much as she wants to, she cannot change the past wat!

kental kan!

i was wif him, abeh, wat can she do to change dat?!

kauuuuuuuuuu.

kental siak ni pompan.

ish.

den, when he told me, he fought wif her and all.

i got really pissed off seh.

pissed at her for doing dis to him.

pissed at him for letting her treat him like dis.

mrepek kan.

but den, i just couldnt be bothered to get involved.

i was more like, "gasak krg ah. if she carik psl wif me, den die kene ah."

dat was my thought at dat moment.

and from den on, aku like really really malas nk layan him.

totally.

he tegor in msn pon tk reply.

if reply pon, he ask sepatah, i ans sepatah.

heh.

den tadi he tegor.

like usual, malas nk layan.

he asked if i got de song my heart.

sent it to him.

den he asked, "u tgh buat ape?"

ME: update blog

on de fone

HIM: ohhh..ngan boi eh....hehehe

*no reply*

HIM: i wana ask u eh
HIM: if la kan
HIM: if u boifren esek marah psl u keeping numbers of ur ex-sch mates...
HIM says: how u fil?
HIM: smpai nk break up
HIM: wad wld u do?

ME:kental ah

HIM: k
HIM:switch dat to my gf

ME:i wud be like "eh whatever lah eh"

HIM:frst of all... ur number ... dier dah biseng2.... den mintak brk
HIM:i rujuk dier...
HIM:den now... i kip my ex sch ite kawan nyer number pon boleh jadi gado

HIM:u tgk ar..

ME: rujuk kape

HIM: dah mcm tk trust in me sey

ME: tau tkpe

HIM: esek2 insecure...
HIM: for once la... believe me la...
HIM: siket2 fil insecure
HIM: i pon naik penat tau nk rujuk...pujok... pompuan tau
HIM: serious ar..
HIM: im tired

ME: ckp ah ngan die
ME: tell me for wat

HIM: i blng siket2 den merajok..

ME: u shud be telling her and trying to convince her

HIM: i tried..
HIM: no use
HIM: she doesnt believe wat i say
HIM: mcm nk pecah kepala sey
HIM: i try nt to hurt her by my words ar
HIM: how sey

ME: but honestly lah eh
ME: if i was in ur place,

ME: wif my tolerance level

ME: dah lame seh i leave her
ME: sorry to say ah

HIM: nah..its aite. its ur opinion

ME: oh wel
ME: *well

HIM: im leaving for australia in 2wks time...
HIM: n she uat hal
HIM: de best part is... wen im there... out in de live firing area... theres no reception
HIM: so i wont b able to make calls or msg like... 2 n half wks
HIM: dat leaves tings for her to tink it tru
HIM: ...
HIM: ni tkleh... tu takleh..
HIM: kawan salah..

HIM: kluar ngan kawan salah..
HIM: kluar gi JB ngan fam salah
HIM: i nk beli PSP pon dier bising2
HIM: ckp waste duit la
HIM: eh, i nyer duit... i nyer suker la

HIM: i yg kejer... bukan dier....
HIM: sumtimes i jus fil like... kill myself... n nt to exist
HIM: esek i uat dier happy
HIM: wen am i gonna b happy
HIM: nt dat im being wit her.. im nt happy... dats nt wat im implying...
HIM: i am happy wit her..
HIM: bud, she don hafta treat me mcm ni per..
HIM: ..
HIM: aniwaes..
HIM: i gtg
HIM: thnx fer de song
HIM: thcr
HIM: byes

ME:errr
ME:ahh
ME:sure
ME:tc

ape ntah.

pls take de time to read dat.

tk kuasa pon, kuasakan diri lah bace tu convo eh.

dah penat2 org edit ni.

ish.

anyways.

so, im just like, whateverlah eh ian.

hahaha.

mungkin, ade org terase if i say dat again.

whatever lah eh iannnnnn.

hahahahahahhaha.

anyways, sorry out of context.

heee.

anyways.

forget bt dat.

aku ni nk story psl sun and mon.

SUNDAY:

last day of werk.

tkde mood.

whole day was quiet.

even haikal noticed.

hahaha.

he was sad, i cud see.

i almost cried at de end of de day, looking at him, at a.adzil, at cik ros.

haha.

haiz.

den before i left, i dedicated a song to all my fave gerais.

heee.

dat excluded de teriyaki boyz.

heh.

whatever.

yah.

but really seh.

i teared a lil when i was leavin de place.

so i quickly called him to distract myself and not cry all de way home.

ish.

ape seh.

haiz.

anyways.

MONDAY:

went shopping.

first went too town.

drop by at bad's place.

but she cudnt talk much cos de boss was ard.

kesian de.

ishhh.

walked to somerset, den took train to bugis.

heh.

all de way we went window shopping.

cos i cudnt decide wat to buy.

nuthin really attracted my eyes.

went from bugis junction to bugis village to icon, still havent bought anything.

ish.

so since it was 6 already, went to tong seng.

sat der.

sampai ngantok.

when we arrived it wasnt really packed.

but ard 6.20 onwards, org makin ramai.

so i had my seafood soup.

wheeeeeee.

and den, after dat we went to bugis village again.

cos i wanted to buy reefinn's present.

wanted to buy him a t-shirt, and myself a watch.

went to dat shop.

last2 tk jadi belik jgk.

den walked sum more to look for t-shirt.

finally decided to buy from topshop.

sekali sekala nk splurge for my adek.

lol.

whateverlah tone.

after dat went to dorothy perkins and saw dis cardigan.

loved it.

bought it.

and another long sleeved shirt.

and bought a bag.

and a watch.

and topman striped tee for reefinn.

and also settled my bills.

i was a really happy and contented girl by de end of de day.

and to put a cherry on top of the ice cream, i got to spend de day with u.

heee.

i had a great day.

really.

i hope u did too.

sorry if i got u bored n tired just walkin ard.

heee.

but i really appreciate u accompanying me.

and to think dat i was de one whining and complaining and tantruming.

lol.

oh well.

thanks again ah, for tolerating.

kekekeke.

heee.

TUESDAY/TODAY:

break fast at home todae.

heee.

cam excited gitu.

lol.

maklomlah.

first time buka pat rumah dis yr.

haha.

woke up at 1 gitu.

den cleaned my room.

until now, tk abes2 lagi.

ish.

dah kol 11.35pm.

started de operation at 2pm.

lol.

mane nk abes, maen lappy je.

update blog nye je, dari kol 8 smp skg.

ahhahah.

siak.

anyways, buka today was full of laffter.

heee.

i really enjoyed today.

shared a lot of jokes.

ahhahah.

kecoh ah sume.

heeheheh.

daddy in a gd mood sumore.

heee.

alhamdulillah.

anyways, going jb maybe tmrw or thurs.

buka out wif beep n mean on fri.

anyways.

saya _ _ _ _ _ kamu!!!!

arrrrggggghhhh.

peace.

sick.

2006-10-15T12:58:00.000+08:00

i think im falling sick.

i feel like vomitting.

my throat feels dry.

and my body feels weak.

lucky today's the last day im werking der.

argh.

looking forward to tmrw.

whee.

anyways, cried twice on the fone yesterday.

first one was bcos of the overwhelming stress dat i suddenly felt yesterday.

and second time was bcos i was scared.

u-noe-i-noe, i-noe-u-noe.

but everythings fine now.

i think.

i hope so.

argh.

i feel so weak and lazy and tired.

oh btw ppl.

light a candle todae for the petition to stop child pornography.

ive lit mine.

will u do de same?

anyways.

i have to go.

...

and.

saya sayang kamu.

peace.

saya dan kamu.

2006-10-13T22:02:00.000+08:00

ok.

lemme take my own sweet time to update.

dah lame aku berniat nk update.

tetapi setiap kali aku nak update, aku seperti terlalu sibuk dengan telefon bimbit ku.

hahas.

klau tk pon, orang2 pat msn sebok nk kacau.

urgh.

anyways.

werk has been good these past 2 days.

cos i didnt hafta see ganyut's face.

kwang3.

lol.

and today was especially..er...memorable.

errr, yah.

was MS CONGENIALITY siak.

urgh.

decided to wear baju kurong to werk.

kekeke.

manis lah kan.

wakakakakakakakak.

so dah janji ngan cik ros.

den siap2, terlambat plak.

so decided to take cab.

niwaes cam paiseh ah, nk naek bus in kurong n all.

i mean, bukan nye raya kape kan.

so took cab.

haha.

a.adzil was der dy.

(btw, we cool now.)

ah, ayie was der also.

haha.

he was wearing baju melayu also.

wahahahhahaha.

baru balek sembahyang per.

den datang je, a.adzil tegor.

ish.

den before dat, nak kluar rumah pon ayah tegor.

wahahahha.

maklomlah, tk pernah nmpk anak perempuan die yg sorang ni pakai baju kurong selain hari raya n jemputan.

wahahahhaha.

excessive reaction seh he.

"wah!! baju kurong ah! nk gi mane ni..."

haha.

"gi keje ah..ape seh."

"cheh..asal? baju sexy2 kau sume dah bes ke?"

"ape jer! *salam him* ok dah bye!"

hahaha.

mrepek ah.

den pat werk, a.adzil dah jalan.

tk lame gitu, abg dj dtg.

wahahahahhahahaha.

"alamak!! die pakai baju kurong lah nari! lawa nye die! alah hai..."

*blush*

*praises2*

but i just kept quiet n smiled.

nyeahhahaha.

so the whole day he like smile2.

ape je!

den after dat.

de pakcik dj lagi satu tu pon tegor.

hahahha.

de ckp so sweet.

wahahaahhaahhahah.

malu lah saya.

den samseng tegor.

of course.

urgh.

de dgn bdk2 yusof briyani tu sume kacau.

siak btol.

ckp ape dah raya eh ke ape ntah.

WHATEVER.

den.

ramai lagi ah tegor.

kedai tunggang balik F69 pon tegor.

al ameen tegor.

hahaha.

asal bnyk org2 briyani yg tegor.

wahahhahaha.

den yg tegor plak, either ckp "dah nk raya ke" or dey give compliments.

hahahha.

of course i prefer compliments.

den.

dah nk buka.

like 6.35pm gitu.

URGGGGHHHHH!

as im typing dis, i feel the embarrassment creep up on me.

hehs.

i bought roti nahn at the new stall in front of teriyaki.

den si rambot pendek tu came close to me and ape ntah whisper2 compliments.

wtf?!

but dats not the thing.

den dah tu, beli air pat PKMIS.

den (haiyyyyoooohhhhhh) i turned left from der cos wanna buy sumthing else at another stall.

den.

mak kau........

tersungkur lah eh!

i almost fell flat on my face!!!!!!!!!

buat malu je!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ish.

siak ah.

right in front of de PKMIS stall.

kuat lah eh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kauuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

as im reminiscing bt it, im hearing again how loud i stomped on de floor.

siak ah.

den pompan pat kepak ayam tu terperanjat and quickly pusing ah tgk pebende.

wahhahahhahahahha.

shit man.

i dunno hu else saw.

definitely bdk PKMIS tu nmpk, and org2 kepak ayam tu.

and sape2 lagi ah pat situ.

ish.

haiz.

dah sweet2, abeh bleh nk jatoh ni!

haiyoh.

klau aku gy menyaksikan itu adegan, sudah tentu aku nk ketawe seh.

shit man.

anyways, tros i walked off quickly, making noise cos dah TERLAMPAU paiseh.

im pretty sure at dat moment my face was as marrooned as the baju i was wearing.

haiyoh.

den ape ntah, ape ntah.

dah buka sume, i wanted to buy air limau pat PKMIS tu ah.

cos the air was so tempting.

abeh dah nk jalan tu, hahahahhahaahha!

one of the guys said, "baik2 jalan tu..."

wahahhahahahahahhaha.

i just turned and laff.

hehehehe.

malu seh.

oh, part tu also, tgh tgu de serve, i turn around ah.

den ter-look at tmpt teriyaki.

den one of dem, yg botak kai cermin mata tu, tgh tgk.

den he gave a bigggg smile.

and i saw the makne ah.

it was in a complimenting way.

hahahha.

thanks everyone for the compliments!

hahahahahhahahahha!

aku ni menjadi2 plak kan.

lol.

WHATEVER MATON.

hehs.

anyways.

dat was all ah for todae.

yeayea.

dat was de most embarrassing thing dat has happened dis week.

ish.

oh well.

yang sudah tu sudah.

yah.

saya ni, sebenarnya, nk update tentang luahan isi hati ku.

ok go.

ehem2. (berita jam 12 malam.)

on a more serious note, shida.

heee.

ok, hmm.

i dunno where to start.

well.

this is for u.

like i mention in a few posts ago.

i have fallen.

yet again.

i really tried hard not to fall u noe.

but i dunno, i just cant seem to explain my feelings sometimes.

my mind keeps on thinking.

u noe how sometimes i just go quiet when we talk on the fone rite.

well, those times, i was thinking also.

i thought, "i am falling hard down on my face. what is he really feeling on the other hand?"

i mean really.

i dunno why, i just cant seem to believe when u say what u said to me.

maybe because of my past.

maybe because u didnt make it sound real enuff.

maybe because its just too fast.

but den again, i haf fallen too, so why cudnt he?

i seriously dunno wat im typing here.

im just trying to express out my feelings.

u noe, whatever i told u yesterday, is not how i totally feel inside.

i still haf alot of unexpressed feelings inside me.

but it just didnt cum out.

i wanted to tell u how i felt the first time we actually met and sat down and talked.

i wanted to tell u dat i was reluctant to go back and to let u go back.

haha.

yerp.

seriously.

i enjoyed sitting and talking and tako-ing with u.

heee.

and den we played the 24hrs game.

i couldnt sleep.

i think it really was bcos of the game.

cos now, im sleeping alot better.

hah.

hmmm.

oh well.

and den, the third meeting.

my heart was filled with insecurities the whole day.

but oni during the journey home was my heart at ease.

but den, balek, on the fone.

insecurities came back.

ish.

palehotak ah.

hati ni asek insecure je.

but eh.

i just wanna say ah.

u are de first guy who's ever made me laff like how u do.

since i known u, der wasnt a day where i didnt smile.

even when i was down like dat time, u tried to cheer me up.

and eventually, u succeeded.

hee.

and.

ape lagi.

haiyah.

im really not good at expressing myself and stuff.

ish.

i just feel like pressing down the backspace button rite now.

ish.

tapi tkpelah.

arghhhhhh.

whatever ah.

nk bace, bace ah.

malu lah saya.

but.

i just hope, this goes well.

(again, unexpressed feelings left.)

peace.

2006-10-10T23:27:00.000+08:00

nyeh.
freakin perverts at the bazaar der are.
urgh.
wth.
sume dah tua ganyut plak tu.
urgh.
its not ganyut:tk tentu pasal.
its more like ganyut:tk sedar diri.
hehs.
call me mean or wat.
i dun care.
im just plain disgusted.
being harrassed by an old haggard faggot.
bleargh.
smlm3 de dedicate lagu, "jangan pisahkan"
if i remember correctly ah.
den smlm2.
urgh.
was eating ayam percik.
den si sebok ni dtg, usik2 ckp,"eh, mkn sorang je? ade lagi? nk siket bleh?"
mak datok.
geli siok.
den aku tk pandang pon ah muke de and said, "nk pi beli ah pat kedai bnyk!"
den die misinterpret it and said, "ah, nk lagik? nk lagi abg belikan."
and off he went.
den i felt like throwing up so i quickly kluar kedai.
came back and saw a foam box ah.
cik ros opened de kotak.
2 kepak ayam.
den i just ignored the kotak ah.
wat u expect me to do seh.
lantak tu ayam?
wahliao.
den ape ntah, tgk balek tu meja, de ade.
and de letak air tebu pat situ.
wtf?!
den.
ignore, ignore.
tgh kemas, alih2 ade satu container of bubur ah.
ke ape ntah ah.
tau suan eh name nye, faz?
ah btol ah tu.
den buat bodo ah.
tgh kemas, den cik ros like whispered.
"eh, ni buang eh?"
wahahhaha.
den i go check blindspot first.
de pat atas stage.
lol.
so we threw the food.
macam wasted jgk ah.
but still.
we just being cautious.
hahahhaha.
cos dat time, before all dis happened, the giving me of food and stuff,
cik ros ade talk to me.
saying my mulot cannot be laser when bbual ngan org.
ade je nanti pape terjadi.
kene buat ke, ape ke.
dat time her anak sedare kene.
was werking at petrol station.
den got one mat m'sia like de gerl.
but de gerl mulot peh laser ah kutok2 dat guy.
one day, dat guy bought mcdoonalds (hehehe) and gave to her.
den she ate, without suspecting anything.
den.
jeng jeng jeng.
...bersambung.
lol.
ah dats why.
bkn aku suka nk buang2 makanan.
malah, aku klau boleh nk makan itu ayam.
namun, ape kan daya.
hahahahhahaha.
wth.
den pat time aku dah nk balek.
i heard de dj say, "ni lagu, pak din tujukan khas kepade wak lan."
wtf.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
den i just pretended like i didnt hear anything, and walked off quickly.
heh.
dgr2 dari cik ros smlm de pon tk dtg.
wth.
anyways.
smlm si sebok samseng tu nk msg.
dah makin malas plak nk layan de.
dah ade matair buat hal ade matair ah.
he msged, "elo there stranger..tk dtg stall nari? dah quit ke?"
den i replied, "ah boleh ah...asal stranger?"
HE: ah? ape yg boleh ah?
CHERRYMONSTAR: boleh ah..quit ke, resign ke, retrenched ke..sume pon boleh ah..
HE: ohh...ok tk ni? mcm tk ok je...
CHERRYMONSTAR: haha..asal? ok jer..hmm...
HE: ohh..ingat down pasal tk dpt keje lagi..den now buat ape? part time pat tmpt laen?
CHERRYMONSTAR: hmm..boleh lah..i will survive..ntah, tgk ah keadaan..hmm..
HE: haha..nyanyi nmpk..abeh tadi satu hari buatpe? slack at home?
CHERRYMONSTAR: hahaha..wahlao. best plak bodoh2kan org pagi2 buta ni..org gi geylang ah tadi..teehee...jgn marah..haha
HE: ohh..thx eh..thx for layankan saya eh..
CHERRYMONSTAR: hahaha..ure welcum..anyways, prasan plak awak saya tkde pat situ..
HE: cheers!
CHERRYMONSTAR: ...ah btol ah..

hehehhehehehe.
amek kau.
kene balek.
aku rase de dah pissed off ah tu.
wth.
do i look like i care nimore.
bleargh.
anyways.

yesterday.
buka luar.
hmm.
wat a ____ day.
only one ____ thing bt yesterday.
dat i get to meet YOU(all).
hahaha.
didnt get proper buka, didnt see any baju dat i particularly like.
bleargh.
and journey home after j.east was worse.
*sigh*
oh well.
lalalaalaaalalalalaaa.
i need to get ready!
hiak dish!
*muacks!*
peace.

i wanna buy dat watch!

2006-10-10T11:21:00.000+08:00

haiz.
apa apa an ntah.
myspace and those kids in dem.
ish.
refuse to make further comments.
anyways.
24hrs.
haiz.
right now, this very second im typing this out, i am left with 12hrs 43mins 30secs to go.
oh well.
dunno why.
didnt manage to sleep well yesterday and just now after sahur.
wth.
tk mungkin pasal ni game saya tidak oleh tidur?
tetapi.
ada kemungkinan nya juga.
hehs.
oh well.
niwaes.
yah.
my feelings are right after all.
finally i asked if he got gf anot.
but indirectly ah.
den he said ade.
so.
tepat skali aku peh prediction.
and anyways, fyi.
im not sad.
cos it only assured me more dat im falling for the right person.
which is obviously not dat samseng.
heee.
anyways.
werk nowadays is being very tough.
a.adzil being such an ass.
urgh.
but i heard he wants to close de shop.
i dunno.
daddy askin me to quit before i get retrenched.
hahaha.
wth.
im making this job sound like sum full-time permanent job and like as if i got a husband n kids to feed at home.
heee.
oh well.
i dunno lah.
im selfish.
if i quit, den i wont haf anything to do for the next 2 wks and duet pon tk masok.
bleargh.
but den again, if i quit, it means i can go buka out as and when i like.
haiyah.
see how lah.
anyways.
cant wait for:
-wednesday
-pay days
-school reopens
-hari raya

btw.
i dunno if dis yr im gonna be in spore on first day.
heh.
ibu asking me to go back kmpg.
lol.
she like nina seh.
indirectly also saying "pls make it happen this yr.."
hahhaa.
ape seh.
anyways.
haiyah.
im trying very very hard to remember where's the place dat sells those damn nice watches.
arghhhhhhhhhh.
and de oni person hu cud help me doesnt remember.
nasrul!!!
help!!!
haiz.
its either at far east or bugis.
haiyah.
its been a few days since i try to remember this place seh.
heh.
tkkan far east.
cos dat time baru pegi.
and tkde pon.
hmmm.
nemind lah.
i hope YOU can accompany me go der on wednesday.
after work.
heee.
anyways.
i gtg.
nk siap.
klau tk nanti lmbt lagi.
and reminder to withdraw money later.
oh yah!
before i forget.
HAPPY --th BURFDAE NENEK!!!
:)
*muacksies*

post of mixed feelings.

2006-10-07T12:03:00.000+08:00

hola.
alone at home now.
fam went to joo chiat.
argh.
so envy dem.
but what to do.
gotta werk.
oh well.
guess im getting my own baju raya.
eh people!
i wanna go geylang!
haizzzzzz.
maybe the last sun of puasa i go geylang.
but dunno with hu.
haiyah.
oh.
niwaes.
dunno why.
suddenly yesterday, i was filled with a sudden hatred for samseng.
when actually he didnt exactly do anything.
hahahahha.
mrepek siak.
the whole day i was like cursing2 him.
kwang3.
and yesterday i was damn pissed off at guys.
hah.
bodoh peh jantan, satu2 dah ade matair lagi nk kenal2 ngan pompan.
dunno ah.
mula2 yg matrep tu yg ade matair.
heh.
lagi lah aku akan pandang hina terhadap nya.
abeh samseng ni plak.
hmmm.
hard to say.
but like i said rase2 mcm he got gf or fiancé.
so whatever.
and so dgn tk sengaje, smlm aku terpandang hina pat die jgk.
didnt even smiled or made eye contact.
oni part time i was going home.
passed by the shop ah when i was going off.
and i was on the fone.
den he said, "BYe!!!"
so terpakse ah pusing.
and just gave him a small smile.
heh.
wth.
and so i think he noticed dat sumhow i was giving him de cold shoulder.
cos tadi pagi ard 4.45am he msged.
he said dat aku ni semakin kerek since dpt tu bnde.
ape je.
wth.
den dis morning when i read de msg, i replied, "Ish..wa tk kerek..lu yg kerek since i dunno when..heh.."
yah.
tgk ah nari cane.
ahhahahah.
u noe i feel kinda stoopid.
being mad at him,bcos why?
cos I THINK he has a gf.
when in reality, i dun even noe if he noes dat im mad at him, and de fact dat he might not haf a gf or fiance after all.
so ntah ah.
tone mrepek ah.
tk tau ah.
anyways, whether he has a girl or not.
i haf cum to a conclusion.
i mean.
wat cik ros said was true.
which most of it i already noe.
yah.
im gonna keep my distance away from him.
lagi2 skg aku dah terjatoh.
haiz.
this morning i was thinking.
aku dah bnyk kali terjatoh.
most of de times, aku bgn sendiri.
a few times, ade org (lelaki) help me up.
but only to push me off himself.
and now.
aku dah terjatoh lagi.
will he help me up?
and push me after dat?
or will he just help me up and hold me in his arms?
hahahhaha.
kauuuuu.
ton jiwang siak.
mrepek ah.
oh well.
niwaes.
again ppl.
i cant wait for school.
miss u guys.
and sorry i cant buke with anyone at all this bulan ramadhan.
i can oni go out on the last 2 days of puase.
cos bazaar dah tutop.
hahaha.
and i think im gonna miss de bazaar.
lol.
wth ah.
this is a post of mixed feelings from a tk btol peh org.
heee.
ok dah ah.
sbelom aku makin mrepek pat sini baek aku brambos.
nk siap.
heeee.
peace.

2006-10-06T10:28:00.000+08:00

faz.

dgr2 kau nye blog tkde tagboard.

ke aku yg tk jmp?

tolong eh.

make the necessary ammendments.

muahaha.

anyways.

i think got new major assignment for 2.2.

hmmm.

too early to say anything.

oh yah, btw SQ.

klau si bdk nakhal ni tanye awak ape blog add saya tlg jgn blg.

nyehehehhee.

ahh, anyways.

as i was saying.

major assignment.

yg si samseng ni plak.

haiz.

gone case.

i think he got gf or fiancé dy ah.

dunno.

just got the feeling.

cara-cara de begitu.

and furthermore.

he's being so mysterious and all.

wth.

name sendiri pon tnk blg.

mrepek kan.

i wont fall for him dat easy ah.

yea.

so now its nafuratin.

no more samafin.

kwang3.

sorry inside joke.

wahahhaa.

anyways, guys.

i cant wait for school.

miss u all dy.

eh aku rase diriku ni dah semakin berdikari seh.

woohoo.

i really dun ask from my parents much.

oni duet skola and concession.

my own stuff alot i buy myself dy.

and im proud of myself.

im handling my own fone bill.

dun think my dad wanna layan pon ah.

muahahha.

ah, den im buying my own clothes.

i think baju raya also i buy myself ah.

bkn nye ape, just wanna feel the sense of berdiri kaki kiri.

heh.

ah den, one thing ive always wanted also i got dy.

got with my hard earned money.

wheehehehe.

im so proud of myself!

kekeke.

i haf a newfound love.

nama nye.

errr.

errrrrrr.

dano.

kekeke.

yea.

cute kan nama nya.

die nye pon cute.

hehe!

i love u, dano!!

nyeheheeheehe.

oh well.

dah ah. nk gi maen game ah.

peace.

samseng bazaar.

2006-10-02T23:07:00.000+08:00

eee.

ape seh faz!

eeew.

mcm nk sepak seh muke nigga tu.

anyways.

well.

days at bazaar is becumin more and more tiring.

haiz.

eh dah ah.

sleep time.

peace.

2006-10-01T00:34:00.000+08:00

yesterday was a strange day.

the whole day my heart was very disturbed.

tk tenteram.

was damn pissed and irritated at those 2 fcukin attention-seeking faggots.

lol.

ah kan.

amek kau.

heh.

anyways, after buka yesterday i had a bandung accident.

slenger siak.

cik ros put her bandung on a hook ah pat "tembok" tepi.

den i didnt see and i went to lean on the "tembok".

abeslah.

sume tertumpah kluar.

and worse still i was wearing white pants.

urgh.

binget je.

den dat wasnt all.

i tot my tk-tenteram-ness ended der.

but no.

reached home, oni reefinn was home.

the rest went to yayi's house for buka.

den was doing my own thing in my room.

bile drg balek, i overheard mum and slenger packin2 as if going sumwhere.

so i went to slenger's room and true enuff, saw dem packin.

asked him ah where he was goin, he said kl.

den before i cud ask wat for, mum came in and said, "mcm tk percaye eh ton..adik mak yg begitu muda, dah tkde lagi.."

den i tot.

mum got 2 half-siblings.

cik tina and cik an.

den i figured out, cik an.

cos since dey just came back from yayi's house.

mesti ade link.

den it kinda hit me.

omg.

cik an passed away.

haiyoh.

and was dat why my heart was so not tenteram.

haiz.

innalillah.

he was still young.

haiz.

oh well.

i think i gtg.

peace.

2006-09-30T00:08:00.000+08:00

haizzzz.
8th day at bazaar.
omg!
dah 8th day!
cepat nyer!!!
arghhhhhhhhh.
oh well.
shit man.
niwaes.
had de best 3 days for the past month.
hehehehe.
haiz.
enjoi.
btw.
noe wat?
eek.
wednesday, anak cik ros dtg.
like typical minah rep.
mng top tapered jeans kinda.
ah den.
at one of the stalls in the bazaar, i call de matrep stall.
cos like typical matrep ah pat situ.
sume bertattoo and all.
den ape ntah, after buke, i heard she telling cik ros ade org mintak no die.
hahaha.
den i like, "lol. ni mesti matrep2 tu."
wahahhahaha.
den pat time kemas, de matrep2 bleh lah plak linger2 depan kedai wak lan.
abeh one of dem, with tattoos n all, pendek, like keep on looking at our direction and senyum2.
wah lahn.
aku piker, klau nk menggatal pon jangan ah obvious sgt ah kan.
den de pompan pon dah mcm gatal.
lol.
den ape ntah, alih2 de pompan bersuare.
"tsk...drg nk mintak no ah..."
den i was like, "ah...so?"
but i oni said, "ah...mintak no kau?"
lol.
wtf.
den she said, "er...tk, no kau..."
nyeahhahahahhahahahhahahahahahhaha!
siak.
dat was like de joke of de day ah.
nyeahhahahahaha.
siak btol.
tk mcm klakar giler lah plakkan.
a matrep bertattoo, chose me over a "nk-kirekan-lawa-jgk-ah-for-a-minahrep" pompan.
wahhahahahahhaahaha.
lol.
yah.
so.
dats was its ahs.
lol.
besides dat, everything was great.
heeee.
:D
u noe, i noe, i noe, u noe.
hehehehe.
ah den.
oh yah.
best plak keje situ.
mcm2 org nmpk.
syed azmir, eka, fauzie, and just now.
shah iskandar.
kekekkekeke.
i made for him mac sup.
haiz.
he came with mummy.
lol.
cute kan.
anjat gegerl.
haiyoh.
den sumore, saw deedeal, saw nizamnina, saw leandra s.i 2004, saw ain e2, saw nut n bell, saw min, saw nina, saw fareez dinky n djsufian.
not forgetting abg sam and abg dj.
lol.
kekekekkekekekeke.
eh dah ah.
penat seh.
nk happy2 pon penat tau.
lol.
haiz.
peace.

2006-09-29T01:24:00.000+08:00

wheeee!

happy today!

damn enjoing my singlehood!

hehhehee!

pls dun rob me of my singlehood!

hehehhehe.

i cant talk much for now.

am online with naf.

but updates.

abg dj.

abg samurai.

ahmat.

naf.

peace.

2006-09-26T11:55:00.000+08:00

was bored and decided to watch hady's performance on youtube.

the one where he sang lagenda.

heh.

cried.

again seh.

wth.

glad dat he became the spore idol.

anyways.

im hungry.

actually wanted to wake up at 12 or 1 ke seh.

den tgh tido, ade je org kacau.

slenger called, ard 9 plus saying dat mum asked me to put the sambal goreng in the fridge.

den ard 10 plus mum called to ask if slenger got call and tell me dat she asked me to put the sambal goreng in the fridge.

wahliao!

nk tido pon tk senang seh.

heh.

so i decided not to continue my sleep cos takot terlajak seh like yesterday.

nyehehehe.

i think i might get ready earlier and go der earlier.

i bet a.adzil is cumin in earlier to put in stuff or what lah.

dunno ah.

see lah how.

anyways, thank darling for dropping by yesterday.

guess wat, ure the first fren to drop by my stall!

yippee.

heh.

yg laen2 tu bile nk smp eh.

hmmmmmmm.

maybe today another fren dropping by.

tgklah cane.

hmm.

im kinda bored.

saya amat bosan.

saya rasa saya ingin tukar kulit blog saya ini.

kekeke.

peace.

2006-09-26T00:53:00.000+08:00

heh.

not surprising at all.

anyways, am sitting in front of the com, gobbling down spoons of mint choco chip ice cream.

pissed ah.

mcm sial.

again, another just proved my long term life statement.

heh.

like wth je ah kan.

mcm siaL.

it was wasted time and effort dat i "stayed true" to u and malas nk layan other projacks.

huh.

go and die lah.

anyways.

just when im not in the mood to do PROJACKS, new assignments keep cumin in.

urgh.

naf.

ahmat.

heh.

menyampah lah plak.

oh well.

dah ah.

i think im logging off.

or i wont be able to wake up in the morning.

buang mase.

btw, here's a tip from the R.G.

dun ever give ppl high hopes when there aren't supposed to be any.

yea.

*ure not worth the time*

signing off, cherrymonstar aka the rebound girl.

peace.

2006-09-25T23:31:00.000+08:00

im too busy to msg u.

from now on, i will be busy with HIM.

so if i dun entertain u at all, u noe wat im up to.

anyways, i think its best if we dun contact anymore at all.

cos i think, soon im hooking up with HIM.

again.

so.

dats it.

i guess dis is de end of our "frenship/relationship/whatever ship".

yah.

peace.

2006-09-25T00:30:00.000+08:00

hi.

first things first, i wanna wish all of the umat2 islam di singapura, malaysia dan indonesia selamat menyambut bulan ramadhan.

mudah-mudahan bulan ramadhan tahun ini merupakan saat-saat yang membawa berkat pada anda dan keluarga anda.

hari ini, aku menyambut hari pertama bulan ramadhan di bazaar.

suasana amat kecoh dan meriah sekali.

tetamu undangan pada hari ini, fauzie laily.

lagi.

yes.

asyik muke die je.

yesterday der was syed azmir, eka mairina, jay jay, and hosts were dalina n sempoi, n hussein saaban and zaleha ape ntah ah.

ah.

today ape cite ntah, asal satu artis ajer.

walaubagaimanapun.

aku bersyukur kerana aku dapat berpuasa dan berbuka dgn sempurna.

dgn makanan2 yg sedia ada di depan mata.

*alhamdulillah*

aku berbuka air nenas, dan mee congo.

hehe.

air yg a.adzil buat was too tempting for me.

heee.

hari berlalu dgn pantas sekali.

berbagai2 godaan dan cubaan yg timbul di depan mata ku.

*astaghfirullah*

namun aku tetap bersabar.

hehehe.

eh, but got a few eye-mos.

eh!

*astaghfirullah*

hahaha.

anyways.

werk was okay.

just tiring.

came at 2, and all the way didnt get to sit down til like 5.45pm.

me and a.adzil especially ah.

den dah dapat dudok, due2 like melt into the chair.

hahahha.

but de beginning mmg kecoh ah, cos kak tuty ade, mama, wak ali, alim, kak yan.

heh.

kecoh ah kan.

den part time buke, a.adzil ah ni.

gelojoh, den he kinda psycho-ed me also ah.

he keep on saying dat the lime drink he made was damn nice.

he took 3 glasses dy.

so i just hadta take a cup.

and sambil minum, kite makan.

den due2 suddenly like stop.

hahahahhahaha.

klakar ah.

due2 perot dah jam!

heheheheh.

mrepek seh!

padehal, i oni drank 2 cups of water, and a small serving of mee congo.

wahliao.

i dunno what he ate, but i think alot ah.

lol.

anyways, reached home ard 9.

alone.

family went to nenek's house.

haiz.

watched s.idol for abit.

but by den dey finished singing dy.

my frens bnyk yg support hady nmpk nye.

and den, i did my own stuff for abit.

alone.

was kinda peaceful.

but den, i felt empty.

as i sat down, in front of the couch, i leaned back and just "analyzed" my emotions.

i felt kinda sad, empty and really really tired.

i was too damn tired to do anything.

really.

im too tired to msg u.

im too tired to even think what is going on rite now.

senang ckp, im really too tired to do anything.

i guess now i noe how faz felt when she said she was too tired to do anything.

haiz.

i dun wanna do anything anymore.

im just gonna be rite here.

if u need me.

but i hope u dont.

peace.

2006-09-21T21:47:00.000+08:00

argh.

ape ni.

i just wanna sing imran's song rite now.

sedih ah tgk ni situation.

hatiku tidak tenteram.

i dunno what to do now.

all i noe is dat im really really sad.

and insecure.

those 2 feelings are dominating my mind.

i really hope tmrw brings a better day.

peace.

2006-09-21T20:11:00.000+08:00

hey.

see.

im always having mood swings nowadays.

yesterday, i was in the hardworking, kind and generous mood.

and well, today, i was in the mood to sew.

yes, sew.

lol.

went "shopping" just now otw to bedok interchange.

haiz.

wasting wasting.

went in my fave baju shop.

saw dis damn cool faded jeans.

den i remembered beep say want dat 3/4 skirt.

so i tot i wanna make it for her ah.

but well beep, before u get ur hopes too high, im sorry to say, the jeans/skirt is too big for u.

lol.

and der wasnt any other sizes.

haiz.

but i still continued sewing it.

for myself i guess.

even when i wore it, its a lil big ah.

need to wear belt.

nyehehe.

so i was in my room the whole of de day, from the time i got home, til like 8 just now.

nyeahahhaha.

naseb daddy tk biseng.

so i sew, sew, sew.

the ah soh.

wahwhahhahahah.

lol.

mrepek ah ton.

ah den.

now de skirt is like halfway done ah.

nyeahahhaha.

jahit tangan lah eh.

tk mcm nk hantar gi tailor lah plak kan.

tapi marsiling seyyyyy.

haiz.

so, i guess, i'll just take my time.

sew, sew, sew.

heee.

i haf lots and lots of cravings rite now.

shall not mention ah.

think ders too many to mention.

eh.

im like alone in dis house.

family out to dinner.

slenger not back yet.

and im having strange feelings.

argh.

like sumone's watching me.

HELP!

eventho the music's super loud, im still scared.

help!

argh.

hey!

my fren just got online!

phew.

dah ah.

de blogging's creeping me out.

hehs.

penakut nye aku.

kekekeke.

peace.

2006-09-20T22:48:00.000+08:00

kau.

like wtf seh.

i feel kinda happy rite now.

when people close to me are happy, im happy.

but u noe, deep in my heart, feelings of insecurities have started to settle.

*sigh*

i dunno why the hell im feeling insecure.

for the first time, im being in a place filled with insecurities.

prolly cos sum people close to me are on neither side of the party.

when actually i was kinda hoping they were on mine.

but its ok, i understand.

its better this way anyways.

i like people being fair.

and i will stand up for my rights anyhow.

berani kerana benar, orang kata.

oh well, as long as i noe dat i didnt do anything wrong.

im trying to find peace in myself.

for now, i keep myself busy with werk, and more of pampering myself.

buying myself stuff dat i havent bought in a long time.

doing facials and stuff also.

anyhows, today was an ok day for me.

i feel like ive exercised a bit todae.

running errands for a.adzil and daddy.

was being extra helpful today.

and kind, and generous.

even treated the family with bbq wings from tenderbest.

yumm.

had de craving to eat dat since like,wat, a month ago?

lol.

yea, so basically, dats all for today.

and u noe, im really at a point in my life where im contented.

my studies are ok, and my r'ship with my family are at the best.

especially the r'ship with daddy.

i love u daddy.

i hope we can stay dis way forever.

yah, and frens, dey are great too.

met up with people i wanted to meet, so the rindu dah kinda terubat ah (konon..) so called.

heee.

but warning dear frens, im afraid i cant meet anybody much during ramadhan which is fast aproaching.

i will be werking like hell, everyday.

having leave only on a few occasions to break fast with people i wanna get together with badly.

and one of dem, is gonna be *you*.

okay?

hopefully dis person noes who im referrng to.

lol.

i dun think so.

but i hope so.

so, wth ah.

im crapping.

heee.

hence, to sumarrise the whole of today, its been great.

thanks people for making my day.

p/s: btw, i think i saw bhaiyyah on tv just now. lol.

peace.

2006-09-19T22:47:00.000+08:00

was watching mawi ina live over at youtube.

kau.

im like wth.

pasal ni pon nk masokkan tv ke.

but den again.

its pure entertainment for me.

wats wif aznil n abg rosyam jadi host.

wahahhaha.

"ye bang..."

tk mcm meluat lah plak tgk die bbual.

mcm buat2 je.

hahahaha.

siak.

anyways, as i was watching dis 13-parts show, im being reminded of my fren and the ex.

haiyah.

whateverlah.

peace.

2006-09-19T19:56:00.000+08:00

argh.

the feeling's cumin back.

oh god.

the feeling of missing u, when u dun call or msg.

the feeling of wanting to be with u all the time.

the feeling of wanting to shelter u from all the troubles and problems in this world, saying "sweetheart, everything's gonna be fine..."

the feeling of wanting to be able to hear ur voice everyday.

the feeling of being able to have sumone to share ur life stories with.

the feeling of wanting to have sumone behind u all the way, supporting u, no matter what u do.

these feelings.

they're back.

god noes when they came, and more importantly, when it's gonna leave.

im just here, waiting.

peace.

2006-09-19T13:58:00.000+08:00

gosh.

i feel so lost.

i dun even noe what to do or feel rite now.

i understand how he feels ah.

but i dunno.

i dun wanna say much bout it ah.

i'll keep the comments to myself.

i'll just have to hope for the best out of everything.

yea.

peace.

2006-09-19T03:26:00.000+08:00

great day today.

went to town with fren.

after dat fren went off to jurong.

den met up with beep and fren.

lepak.

went to suntec to watch movie.

thanks fren!

i owe u one.

watched little man.

was okay.

damn funny.

hehehe.

well, after dat went to mkn at kfc.

after dat tot wanna go esplanade chill.

but tk jadi.

cos beep's mum called dy, so she hadta be back home.

den we headed home.

dat was to simplify todae.

overall, i had a wonderful day.

anyways, im having mixed feelings now.

my feelings are all jumbled up now.

i seriously dun noe.

haiz.

dah ah

peace.

2006-09-18T12:06:00.000+08:00

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

kau.

tk mcm coincidence lah plak kan de lagu.

dats What Hurts The Most by Rascall Flatts.

haiz.

wth ah.

dah ah.

im out.

somerset at 2.

hehehe.

2006-09-16T23:35:00.000+08:00

2006-09-16T01:15:00.000+08:00

haf so much to update on.
but kinda not in the mood.
really pissed and disappointed and sad all at the same time.
but i knoe i shudnt be this way.
things are going well for me.
well at least things at home are.
hmmm.
im really getting along well with my family.
good good.

other stuff, just okay2.
still struggling to survive.

dats it ah.
im so not in the mood to update abt camp.
i'll just get more pissed off.
peace.

2006-09-09T17:42:00.000+08:00

nyeahhaha.

hello.

feels like i havent been updating for so long.

well went out with mean yesterday and de day before.

nyeahahha.

"omg, i can't believe im going out with u again, when i just met u yesterday!"

hahaha.

she sounded like we just had de first blind date, baru bersua muka de first time je.

wth.

anyways.

met up with her tot wanna go cycling.

but when we left our house, it was rainin barney n tellytubbies ah!

wahliawey kan.

so we kinda didnt noe where to go.

took cab to admiralty, den we looked at the lines track.

nyeahahhaha.

tot by the time we reach east coast maybe by den, de raining might haf stopped eh.

but dunno.

decided to take to jurong east den go towards p.ris ah.

so maybe otw we can fork out sum ideas on where to go.

when we reached clementi, the sky was already shining brightly.

ape dah.

den mean said "eh klau kite turon clementi, we can go west coast park."

den i tot, alah klau tk dpt east coast, west coast pon jadilah.

asalkan ade tempat nk bercycle.

i was already gian nk tunggang.

neyahhahahaha.

wtf.

so we alighted at dover the next station and took cab to west coast cos mainly i was too lazy to search for wat bus going where.

den reached west coast park, i was so damn jakuns siak.

never been der sia.

wahliaoweyyyy.

so if we got camp or just wanna chill, we can go der!

wheee!

hehehehee.

so we walked around looking for the bike rental place ah.

walk and walk and walk but no shop was to be seen around except for mcdonalds at the

entrance.

finally we decided to ask these 2 guards where the bike rental place is.

cos we saw one apek ni riding, den de bicycle got de no tag.

but noe wat de guard said?

"sorry ah, sini tkde tmpt sewa basikal."

sia lah.

tk mcm disappointed lah plak kan aku ni.

den we decided to go to clementi station.

mean dah make noise cos we kinda wasted the cab fare of going der(west coast park).

so we decided to not make it wasted sgt, and we took pics.

nyeahahhaa.

siak btol.

we sat pat tmpt yg mcm obstacle course where der was only ropes which we cud climb.

nyeahahhaa.

dah amek2 sume, den we went to clementi.

took cab lagi.

we were torn whether to go east coast-cycle, airport-take pics, town-window shop.

nyeahhahahaha.

but finally guess where we went?

bugis!!!

nyeayahhahahhaha!

siak eh.

and FINALLY!!!

i got my TONG SENG!!!

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

nyeahhahahaha.

i think my frens must all be really "wth?!" as to why i like tong seng so much.

i dunno ah guys, i just find de place nice.

cheap and nice.

nyeahahhaha.

so i had "beehoon seafood soup".

had sumthing soupy.

hehehehe.

ehem2.

yah.

so we ate and talked.

saw 3 cute guys separately ah tho.

den after dat, we proceeded to arab st.

tot wanna go to the diy shop.

but in the end, we just went to sum lorongs and took pics.

my god.

and u noe wat.

gosh.

we came to dis one lorong.

gosh.

dey were selling nice and affordable vintage clothes!

arghhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i was damn into the shop dat mean started to make noise dy.

haiyahhhh.

but i did buy one so called dress.

de places got alot of dress ah eh, i notice.

and so damn damn cheap.

fcuk!

if only i cud stay der.

am so gonna go there again.

soon.

and so.

I JUST DISCOVERED ANOTHER LORONG!!!

and yah, i made another discovery also on our outing der.

found one shop.

very the hippie2.

very the reggae2.

very the peace-no-war kinda.

very the vintage ah senang ckp.

kau.

damn coolness.

i cud feel my soul like kinda being lifted up.

serious ah.

gosh.

org tkkan paham.

i mean i really felt the shop.

unlike places yg i really liked to go, really awwed the place, but this was like.

beyond words ah.

haizzzzz.

anyways.

haiz.

after mean makin noise at me like non-stop, i finally had to part with the shop.

so we went to walk tothe mrt.

otw we saw one like small garden.

very the coolness seh.

looks like we were at london or sumthing.

if only the camera is correct.

next time i go there, i wanna borrow slenger's cam.

haiz.

so we walked, and otw, we stopped at parkview square.

also known as gotham city spore.

nyeahhahaha.

dats de second time im going der.

first time was with mus.

heh.

ingat lagi aku.

i think he was de first person to bring me to arab st.

nyeahahahaa.

yah den, i cudnt tahan, wanted to go toilet.

so we went in.

the place was like fcukin grand sia.

damn damn nice.

haiz.

even the toilet, or restrooms rather i shud call it.

even the restrooms looked like offices from outside.

nyeahhaha.

i never actually went in before cos we just kinda sat at the "small parks" outside.

so we went toilet.

nyeahhahaha.

relief.

hahahha.

den went we went out, i looked out.

tk prasan.

den suddenly mean said "eh, hujan!!!"

den i like look out again.

aah lah siakkkk.

nyeahhahahhahahaa.

tk mcm terperanjat berok lah plak kan.

didnt notice de first time i looked out cos i tot the water was sum fountain.

nyeahhahaha.

cos the place mmg ade fountain sume.

hahahhaha.

mrepek siak.

again, it was raining barney and tellytubbies.

nyeahahhahaa.

and so we were stuck in the rain.

lebat giler nyer!

so we decided to wait, and guess wat we did?

kluarkan camera!

nyeahahhahhaa.

ah beh!

hahaha.

so we took pics, and we took one, "pic of the day"!

hahahhaha.

nice.

but my eyes, one big, one small.

nyeahhahaha.

oh well.

den it was like kinda late, so we decided to run in the rain.

at least out of the place, to the shelter below.

out of gotham city ah.

and luckily we brought our towels.

hahahhaha.

ye ye orr pe nk go beach mandi sume.

hahahhaha.

so we ran, and got out.

phewwww.

den we walked to the station.

mean made new fren with umbrella lady.

hehehehe.

so, in the train, saw iskandar 858.

hahahhaa.

den got 2 irritating chinese girls.

so damn noisy!

anak sape ntah.

urgh.

by the time we reached wdlands i was damn tired.

bought lekor.

again!

hehehehe.

nina, if ure addicted to popcorns, im addicted to lekor!

hehehe.

den walked home.

actually more like me send her home.

and she sent me to the bustop.

nyeahahhahaa.

siak btol.

everytime i go out 2 org with any of my gf, i always hafta be the bf.

haizzzzz.

den mean like addicted to taking pics dy.

so we took pics on the road, in the park and a last one before my bus came.

nyeahhahahaa.

by the time i was walking mean home, i was practically dragging my feet seh.

well, i cant even chew on my lekor without tiring myself!

nyeahahhahaha.

i was like *chew*chew*chew* "haiz...penat ah..."

nyeahahhaha.

siak eh.

heehee.

mean make noise again cos im lazy.

nyeahhahahaha.

wth.

niwaes, after dat went home, and tros *bam!*

tidooooo.

hehehe.

lucky today bleh bangun.

heee.

eh dah ah.

hafta type out the programme flow.

short update one my date with mean de day before yesterday eh.

met her at b.n.s.

i was late as usual.

nyeahhhaha.

dunno why, i can never be early when mean ade.

i think she used to it dy.

wahahahhahaa.

den we sat at depan civic.

chatted n chatted.

she told me stuff i never knew ah bt wickedwitch.

nyeahhahaha.

dah pandai!

heee.

yah.

den got these 3 police officers going ard checking id.

heh.

ape siak.

2 of dem cute.

one of dem cute giler.

nyeahahha.

yg cute giler tu ah yg asked for our id.

ehem2 tnk.

hahahahaa.

wtf.

yah dats it ah.

heeee.

peace.

2006-09-06T16:06:00.000+08:00

heyness.
am back.
kinda had a shitty day.
met the liars at ecp just now.
liars+new members=nina, nizam, nasrul, emah, azfar.
den me and kamal came.
nyeahhahahaha.
ate, lepak for abit.
den dey watched fast n furious.
tokyo drift ah.
"fast and fuyooooo!"
nyahahha!
den went back.
not enuff sleep man.
im really lacking of sleep.
at werk just now was kinda boring and really tiring.
a.us eel wasnt der.
went to jobor i think.
nyehahahaha
jobor nut!
hehehe.
so i did like alot of werk.
got 45 for today.
thanks.
alhamdulillah.
nyeahhahaha.
den in de bus ade couple siak.
chinese chibais mfs.
bodoh siak.
nk motek pat dlm bus.
laek ni motek stage 3 tau!
or u can call it 3rd degree motek.
dah kire rabak nye.
sial tol.
i think dey did jobs for each other.
in the bus!!!
almost full bus!
den de seblah got makcik sumore.
den i was like really2 pissed!
i felt like feeding dem a dish of vulgarities.
naseb baek aku pakai tudong.
and naseb baek aku sorang.
sial ah.
seriously ah.
wtf?!
urgh.
den now im home.
irritated by my lil bro.
kau.
nk kai com pon nk nyebok.
nyehahahaha.
he's like reading everything i type.
"afin belo!"
nyhahahaha!
anyways.
ppl.
i got a few places to visit before puase, which also means my menghilang period of time.
a job ad in cherrymonstar.blogspot.com.
part-time position to be filled up immediately!
if u have what it takes to accompany me to:
1) cycling & cable-skiing at ecp.
2) swimming at swimming pool/sentosa
3) town-ing (lame tk go town!)
4) zoo/escape/ wild wild wet.
5) sheesha-ing at arab st.
6) karaoke-ing.
7) shopping (bedok/jobor)
yeayea.
interested applicants to accompany me to these places, please call ms cherry @ 82228073 asap.
immediate positions.
requirements:
able to work at flexible times.
nyahahahhhaha!
dats it.
call me!
peace.

2006-09-05T15:40:00.000+08:00

gosh.
i was damn sleepy sia de whole day.
just now, tgh cuci pinggan, i fell asleep.
kental kan!!
nyeahahhahaha.
tgh berdiri seh cuci pinggan.
amcm boleh tetido pon tk tau ah.
was damn sleepy.
anyways.
bro's out cycling with his frens.
slenger out at sch.
mum at werk.
dad cumin home soon.
im so bored.
havent updated for a really long time.
and yea.
alot has happened.
went to friQ's chalet last sun.
it was okay.
i bought nina some popcorns cos the one she ate the day before havent satisfied her enuff.
den met her at yishun and took 39 from der.
she looked good.
nyeahhahaha.
she said she met some anak2 abu in de bus and felt like snorting sorang2.
nyeahhahahahahahha!
(sorry ah nina, i hadta announce. heee.)
den reached p.ris.
der was a sea of green mass.
and we saw raj!
hehehehe.
its been along time dy lah.
den talked for abit ah.
aku takot je klau2 ternampak bala kan pat situ.
siak.
ah den we didnt noe how to go to de chalet.
as in what bus to take.
tk mcm kental lah plak kan.
ended up we took the wrong bus to the place, which was supposed to be at downtown.
aku peh slengerik, i go and call faz to ask which bus no to take to pasir ris park.
niapadah.
dah we took de bus 403.
aku plak confident ah kan.
when we were queueing up, der was dis mama who was kinda lost and asked us how to go to aloha loyang.
den we like kinda talk to him for abit, telling him where to go n all ah.
we say, usually got shuttle bus go der.
den he walked off, and went we turned around, we missed the bus!!!
kauuuu....
like wth sia!
siak btol.
den de foreign couple in front of us pon kinda miss de bus.
i dunno why ah, tgh motek kot.
den ape ntah, we hadta wait for the next bus ah.
satu2 dah mcm maki2 dat mama.
nyeahhahaha.
so we took de 403.
i tot dat bus go downtown.
kental ar.
tk mcm konedi ah plak.
ah den part dah smp p.ris park, nina like tegor mcm salah bus je.
den i went up to de apek bus and asked.
nyeahhahahahaha.
abeh, ternyata we took de wrong bus.
so we took de bus back to p.ris int.
tk mcm lame plak de journey kan.
den like along the way back, we kinda lost our mood ah.
penat seh.
in the beginning dah enjoi ketawe2 den penat ah, mood pon merosot.
so patah balek p.ris int, jmp nut skali.
nyeahahhahaha.
den we took 354 to downtown.
kental siak.
padehal terang2 ade tertulis pat signboard tu.
nyeahahhahaa.
bodoh tol.
sorry ah nina.
ah den we proceeded der, met friQ at the entrance.
den when we actually reached the chalet.
tk mcm terperanjat plak kan.
peh ramai orang.
mostly i dunno.
the only ppl i knew der was, fairdaus, hazim, xing long, and of course friQ ah.
den lepak kejap.
friQ cut the cake, took pics.
den sabo friQ, and dudok lagi kejap.
den we went off.
ade a few eye-mos ah der.
but i think bnyk de sister's frens.
den we went home, me n nina bought mcd ah to eat in the bus.
and noe wat.
peh kental, i was sitting down, with the bag of burger and fries in my hand.
den mcm goyang2 siket ah.
suddenly the bag felt lighter.
den i looked down, and i saw my fries on the floor.
ape seh.
i felt like crying and laffing at the same time.
but i was too tired so i ended up not doing either one.
nyeahahhahaha.
wth.
den nina like lost.
den she like, "eh! angkat lah! angkat!!"
hahahahhaha.
dah jadi cam mak die and chendol.
nyeahhahahha.
den i paiseh2 ah picked up de fries and put it back to the plastic bag.
den dudok kejap lagi.
like after 2 mins gitu, i went like "eh. amcm ni fries bleh jatoh gitu je. not like i was swinging de bag or anything."
den i looked at the bag.
bodoh siak.
koyak.
den dat part i laffed and laffed non-stop.
ppl must think dat im crazy.
nyeahahhahahahhaa.
den i like maki2 mc oledi.
like "i'll see u in court" thingy.
wahahhaaa.
den finally we took de bus and ate in the bus.
hahahhaha.
a few other things happened.
oh so nina noes my dirrrty little secret.
and the mcd toilet thingy.
den when i took 969, de sleepy kid in th bus.
nyeahahahhaha.
cute siak.
ah.
so reached home like 11.30 gitu.
hahahhaa.
yeayea.
dats it ah.
hari2 laennye event sume dah tk ingat plak.
ohhh niwae, ANDAI aku jadi milik mu satu hari.

2006-08-27T10:19:00.000+08:00

wth.
had a chaoticday yesterday.
started off with werking at bedok ah.
otw home, bala picked me up.
cos we planned to go jb ah.
so he waited bwh blk while i change for abit.
den proceeded to jb.
peh jam!
wahliao.
by the time we went in was already like 5?
yea.
wasted time alot ah.
after dat i called bro and he said he wanted to pick me up.
so i left bala and waited for asyQee at komtar's bustop.
with bala's extra helmet cos he didnt have one for me.
haiyoh.
useless bro.
tk abes2 menyusahkan me and bala.
so bala left for spore cos he had a chalet going on at 6.
den asyQee picked me up and brought me to meet his frens.
haiz.
rosak rosak.
siak btol.
dey were drinking.
he drinkssss.
wtf ah.
alasan die?
he's stress bout sinta.
ape siak.
and den dey were drinking and drinking.
der was kecik n girl, gemok, gajah, epul, abang and asyQee.
and den timon, linda and tepo joined.
followed by mizie and yaya.
so i was just sitting der like an idiot watching de guys drink.
kental siak.
if not wrong, epul, mok and kecik were like drinking and challenging who can drink the most and the fastest ah.
kental siak.
dey are a bunch of kental kids who tries to be cool by drinking ah.
konon nye "wah aku bleh minom lebih dari kau..kau bodoh aku pandai.."
dat kinda thing u noe.
and den i was just sitting ah.
dey were like very dramatic ah.
minum tgh2 ptg buta.
den dah mabok sume mcm bdk gile.
abeh si linda plak, die baru cerai dgn pakwe die abeh nk nanges2.
"aku sayangkan die..."
ape siak.
timon dah memang cam pompan tk btol.
but shes not drunk.
she's like dat ah.
the girls didnt drink wat.
only de guys.
after dat, we al proceeded off ah.
dah mlm kan.
tak salah dgr2 nk go makan ah.
abang nk blanje.
den dah smp like danga bay gitu.
bike count jap, 2 motor tkde.
kecik n girl, n abang n mok.
ape siak.
den tepo got a call.
i think abg called and asked us to patah balek.
so we went back.
bac to the lepak place.
the bustop der ah at least.
and noe wat, dey were fighting.
like wtf sia.
kecik and mok if im not wrong.
den abg and epul tried to stop dem.
waddehell.
ended up de 4 of dem gadoh.
last2, epul binget, he got on bike and rode off.
even after gajah tried to stop him.
den after dat.
woah.
sumthing heart-wrenching happened.
gosh.
abg was wearing THE HELMET.
tgh2 die nak stop mok n kecik ni gadoh, i guess die pon dah naek rimas dgn DAT HELMET on his head, he took it off and threw it on the floor lah siaaaakkkk!!!!
like eh sialah!!!
aku peh hati mcm WTF??!!
aku mcm nk nanges siol tgk helmet tu dicampak dgn begitu sahaje.
sial btol!
bertambahlah pissed off aku dibuat nye.
i really felt like taking a gun and shoot all those fuckin drunkards.
siak btol.
den i carefully, lifted the helmet from the floor.
like a baby, i held it close to me.
i laid it slowly on an empty space.
den ape ntah, ape ntah.
gajah managed to calm mok down.
den si mok ni pi dudok depan helmet tu.
den tk lame, kecik start "bukak" balek.
saying things dat provoked mok.
den si mok got agitated and almost knock the helmet down to the floor siak.
waduh2.
lagi skali, my heart like "oh god." kejap.
haiz.
den i took the helmet, placed it next to mizie (cute) and said "eh, tlg eh..jagekan.."
and he just smiled.
wtf.
den de show went on.
during the interval i went to 7-11 and bought sum snacks to munch on while watching the show.
bought seaweeds also.
de show was like ape seh, close to 2 hrs.
wtf.
seriously, it wasted my time.
if i had known dis wud happened, i wud haf left for spore with bala seh.
urgh.
wth ah.
membingetkans.
niwaes gtg.
daa.
peace.

2006-08-25T00:48:00.000+08:00

hate YOU part II.
ape sial.
bodoh.
im starting to really hate you rite now.
like really seriously truly.
i cant even stand to look at you now.
everytime i try to, hatred fills me like, totally.
i dunno ah.
since dat chat.
i dunno what the fuck u want.
like seriously.
ape kau nak ni?????
urgh.
knnccb ah.
gi mampos ah.
get this clear.
i dun even wanna be ur fren.
so get lost.
get out of my life.
dun start to piss me off again.
dun let it start all over again.
dun bother bout my life.
bother bout ur fucking self first.
get this straight.
"are you my anything?"
well, u are.
ure just an unwanted pest in my life.
dats it man.
gosh.
wtf.
i shall say no more.
get lost.

2006-08-24T03:06:00.000+08:00

gosh.
its 3 in the morning.
dun think im getting any sleep today.
goin school later for the maths remedial thingy.
im supposed to be like studying rite now.
but im not.
just dun feel like it.
dunno why, but i really cant get mysef to study for this exam.
i mean, i noe dat i really hafta, cos if not im gonna like, practically die.
but i just cant get myself to it.
argh.
tomorrow!
no deelee darelee.
lol.
however u spell dat.
well, a few stuff to update on.
this fri, maths2 paper.
this sun, beep's sis wedding.
next tues, epdes paper.
next thur, dfund paper.
gosh.
takotnyer.
lol.
woohoo.
i just destressed myself.
was chating with jackson for abit der.
hahaha.
he switched on his webcam.
wat sia.
next to him was fadhil.
next to him, joyce.
next to her, x-lex.
hehehe.
miss dem lar.
heee.
and im also destressing myself bby listening to hafiz's songs.
siak btol.
hahahahhahah.
waddefuck.
mrepek siak.
lol.
nyeahahhaha.
but den again eh, i dun really haf much to destress lah.
heee.
yah.
so as i was saying.
yea haf no mood.
but i'll try.
yesterday went shopping.
walked to int from pasar and window shopped.
on the way bought 2 tops, one sweater.
7 bucks in total.
after dat went to wdlands lib.
studied for abit den mean joined.
after dat we rounded cwp.
went to watsons and i bought some facial thingies.
lol.
first time seh nk amek kisah pasal muke ni sume.
niapadah.
after dat went to metro.
i bought 2 sportsbra.
using my own money.
like wow bagoskan.
first time tau.
ahh.
so in total i sent like 7+8+13=28
on all those things.
heee.
best.
at least i didnt waste it on food.
unlike today.
haiyah.
went to school.
didnt study much.
played around, wasted time.
finally jalan2tamp.
ape siak.
ate at lj.
treated wak n nut.
yeayea.
eh noe wat?
i think i better get sum rest.
urgh.
daaa.

2006-08-21T17:30:00.000+08:00

feeling so lazy rite now.
just pigged out on tidbits with my bro just now.
ate a lil bit of each, which eventually totals up to alot.
the pretzelish-wheels, prawn crackers, mushroom thingy(not nice!), fish fillet strips.
siak.
and i bought crunchie.
heee.
its monday.
i always happen to have a fetish to binge and pig and just plain eat alot on mondays.
heh.
ate meehoon sup in the morning, sum kuehs, and all the tid-bits.
sumore i had the cheek to think of eating ice cream.
wth.
i really need sumone or sumthing to motivate me to lose weight.
gosh.
now im sleepy.
niwaes, went to the makan2 at wak's place yesterday.
went with asyQee on bike.
hah.
met nadia, rusy, farhan, hafiz.
den shida and hisyam came.
den yuni and her farhan came.
den nasrul came.
den faz came.
den we left.
oh well.
yesterday, pigged out also.
chicken, hotdogs, sotongball, currypuff, jemput2 udang, crabmeat stick.
came home, daddy bought durians.
again.
haiz.
den hadta eat.
again.
finally.
at the end of the day, felt really bloated with stuff.
i really felt like throwing up.
and i did.
forced myself.
urgh.
disgusting.
den went to sleep early.
heee.
nice sweet outing yesterday.
today, planned to go to school or study at the lib.
but i reached home like 3.
so it was kinda late.
furthermore my lil bro is sick.
so i decided to stay home and take care of him.
lol.
family bonding or wat.
yesterday, was good to asyQee.
bought for him the crogs imi.
he liked it.
uhuh.
well, so im just staying home.
i feel like a load has been lifted off cos i settled all my bills and stuff.
paid my remaining amount of bill, bought concession, bought a pack of kotex.
de next thing to focus on now is the vans black n gold.
yeayea.
and to save money.
heeee.
woooohhhhoooooo.
peace.

2006-08-19T16:35:00.000+08:00

hooo.
been a long 3 days.
thurs was weird.
fri was piss-ful.
and today is tiring.
THURSDAY:
woke up with only like maximum 2 hours of sleep.
tried to stay up the whole nite.
but finally fell asleep at 4.
lol.went to school.
mike picked me up.
lucky me.
thanks alot mike.
after dat, left school around 1 with nina and mike.
mike sent us home.
before dat he treated us to lunch at lj yishun.
ape seh.
dah mcm bapak and anak2.
amek kite dari skola, den gi lunch.
lol.
mak keje lah.
hahaha.
well, after dat he sent us home.
wheee.
i went back, took mp3 and went lib.
studied epdes.
dat was until dis initially-tot-he-was-cute-but-now-irritating guy disturbed me.
the first time i saw him i tot he was ok.
den he called me over to sit with dem.
btw the other 2 of his frens were from woodgrove, same batch as myself.
yah, and den i joined dem cos the table i was sitting at was already like overloaded.
kau.
ingat mcm cool guy mane, abang2 mane kan.
cos i only like glanced at him.
den part die bbual.
kau.
tk bleh angkat!
kentalanbuahlodeh btol!
turns out adek2 ah siak.
as soon as i came over, he asked me my name.
den he introduced himself as azli.
den he asked wat skul i was from, tp.
den i asked him back ah, cos he looked like sum poly guy kan.
den at first he said innova jc, pointing at ijc foolscap on the table.
i was kinda surprised ah, but sembarang ah, buat bodo je ah.
den die ketawe2 nonstop hits.
lamer giler tau, smp kan it made me feel awkward.
ape sial.
babi ah.
den after dat, he said he was from bmc academy.
abeh tros die tanye "dah brape lame dgn matair?"
i went like "huh? wtf?"
ape siak.
tu part tros dah malas nk layan die.
he seem too eager so its kinda boring.
tkde challenge langsong.
its like a total turn off ah.
urgh.
and den he started telling me his story bout him and ex-gf.
like.
whatever!
den last2 he asked for my number.
den i like terpakse ah, cos he was like sitting rite in front of me sia.
takkan nk lari.
den dat nite he called and msged i didnt reply.
sapa mau layan seh.
irritating shit nyer.
ah den skg dah senyap.
heee.
bagos bagos.
FRIDAY:
i hate khalid.
totally hate-guys day.
update next time.
TODAY:
went to bedok as usual.
den makcik yg tlg my dad tk dtg.
siak btol.
reefinn plak tkde.
so i hadta help out both today.
was damn tiring.
binget siak at firstly, dat makcik, secondly, reefinn, and thirdly, daddy.
who likes to werk wif him also i dunno ah.
oh well.
yang sudah tu sudah.
oh! and i saw nina's aunt just now.
she and sape tu, ija tk salah.
i dunno the name ah.
i was washing plates.
den baru nk kluar salam dem, dey went off dy.
ape dah.
nk msg nina dari tadi asek lupe jek.
haha.
anyways, got home to find out dat asyQee is here.
ni satu.
tk abes2 nk menyusahkan aku.
sial peh jantan.
argh.
helmet tu ntah ape dah jadi.
i told him i dun wanna masok campor, den he was happy.
he said it kinda made it easier for him to "menghilang".
sial ah.
now im like stuck in the middle.
si bala ni dahlah buat prangai.
urgh.
wtf ah.
cam cibai ah jantan2 ni sume.
haiz.
hate-guys partII.
haiz.
dunno lah kan.
ape nk jadi, jadi lah.
gosh.
malas nk layan.
skarang, aku nk go study.
wheeee.
peace.

2006-08-16T17:51:00.000+08:00

betol peh lagging sak ni com.
now its still like loading.
haiyah.
whateverlah.
well, exams coming.
after exams, holidays.
during holidays there's this BIE camp and dey asked us for help.
after submitting de names, people making plans to go some place else.
i dunno ah.
dah submit seh name.
abeh tk tau ah.
drg ckp nk go clubbing lah, nk go east coast lah, yg pentingnye, dey wanna lepak outside.
ape seh.
i dunno ah.
i told fyezal dy dat im going.
i dun think im joining dem ah.
i dun think im wanted der anyways, so what the hell rite.
heee.
limit2 klau drg go, sejarah mungkin berulang.
anyways, i feel like a stranger nowadays.
memang pon per.
well, dats wat i asked for.
heee.
:)
now im living in dis school, alone!
alone!
hahhahaha.
wtf.
lol.
anyways, waiting for 6.30 gitu.
leaving to pasir ris.
meeting ahh smart later.
haiyoh.
for old times sake.
waited for like 4 hrs.
he so owe me sumthing.
oh well.
balek nk blaja.
seriously.
i have no motivation to study whatsoever.
haiz.
too much happened dis semester.
how i wish i cud use the universal remote controand rewind back time.
oh well.
dah ah.
wanna get ready to go off.
peace.

2006-08-13T14:10:00.000+08:00

fcuk.
my body's aching and my ribs are like crushed slightly when i breathe in.
dunno why the hell.
must be cos of the lack of sleep.
gosh.
anyways, again went to esplanade.
dats like the 3rd or 4th time dis week i went der.
also bugis/arab st.
oh well.
fireworks was ok.
the first one i watched, saturday, was like so frustrating, cos of all the tress blocking our view.
which in the end, made me distracted by other things.
haha.
den the second time i went der, was on tues, it was okay.
better but still a lil blocked.
anyways i was already distracted from the beginning cos i wanted to watch the performance and the fireworks didnt matter much to me.
and den yesterday, was the best.
the most clear one i got.
cos well, we were literally by the bay.
nasrul was with his cuzzins and dey've been like sitting der since i dunno what time.
we came at 6.30 like dat.
tu pon dah pack.
nk go toilet, nk buy icecream n all was really troublesome.
de queue to the girls toilet melampau plak tu.
membuak-buak.
heh.
den finally we just sat ah from like 7.30 to 9 waiting for the fireworks.
noe-ing me, cacing kepanasan, dunno how to sit still for long, i really tried my best to just shut up and sit quietly.
haha.
and i did.
no complains or whinings whatsoever.
haha.
den de fireworks.
it was beautiful.
managed to catch a few pics on my fone.
after dat, we met up with fahmy and faris and teeth.
i dunno how to spell the guys' names.
and den, we split from der.
nasrul went off with cuzzins, pogee went off with fahmee and farees.
haha.
notice the last three guys'names mention all got double Es.
nyeahahaha.
finall there was only me, nad, teeth and nina.
went to marina sq to eat.
but it was freakin packed.
nina went to meet nizam.
and den finally me, nad and teeth went to bugis eat.
tot of going to tongseng.
craving for dat since i dunno when.
finally we just went to lj.
bawriinnng.
had our dinner.
by the end of our dinner, my eyes were heavy dy.
lol.
den proceeded to take the trains.
split with teeth cos she took the bus.
we took the train to marina dy den we got off.
nyeahahahaha.
decided to wait for my mum.
hehehe.
siak.
den went down at city hall.
i was like freaking excited to be at town at nite.
happy and also kinda emo a lil ah.
reminded me of salleh malleh jiggy jig.
hahks.
but whatever it is, we roamed the streets of city hall.
kinda boring ah, cos city hall seh.
if at orchard sumthing ah.
den sat down for a bit and saw jagan and friends.
dey going clubbing.
lol.
where?
indian club.
ahahhaha.
me and nut were like laffing after dey went off.
i was thhinking mesti maen lagu hindustan kape eh, klau tk pon tamil boyz.
nyeahahha.
and we saw this one more tp guy, dunno de same.
smiled at each other.
haha.
den we went back to esplanade, maklomlah, cacing kepanasan.
hahaha.
sat at the lampu.
it was near the alley.
mother msged saying she was watching bhangra.
wakakakkakaka.
siak.
we were sitting2 and den suddenly these two guys walked past us, looked at us and said
"assalamualaikum.."
so we answered ah.
den i like smile je ah.
den he said, "mengeratkan silaturrahim.."
mcm paham.
den waited for abit and den mother called.
i was dead sleepy and slept on the way home.
lol.
yea.
reached home at 1.30.
hahk.
wth.
sampai bedok mcm zombie lagik.
lol.
eh eh.
dah ah.
nk go siap.
heh.
maybe go jb.
peace.

she picked

2006-08-12T16:31:00.000+08:00

*sigh*
waiting for people to call me.
dunno.
dey seem reluctant to contact me.
im not surprised.
called up teeth.
she's joining.
maybe i'll catch a ride from mum.
nina's m.i.a.
tried calling her from just now.
no answer.
faz must be out with baba.
lol.
more like ali baba.
tapi panjang sgt so just baba will do.
heh.
niwaes.
had a shitty morning.
went to meet bala for awhile.
he passed me my sweater and den i updated him for abit.
after dat i went home.
wanted to go to the performance at cp.
nobody wanted to follow.
so like oh well.
even called harry up to ask if he was going cos i checked, and he wasn't werking.
den he said, he's one of the performers.
i was like wth.
and i didnt even noe.
so i guess dat just shows where i stand in his life.
almost non-existent.
*sigh*
oh well.
i think he thinks dat im like chasing after him.
like wtf, jgn prasan sgt ah.
all i wanted was to start afresh as friends.
cos like suddenly we lost contact, was kinda weird.
hmmm.
no further comments ah.
niwaes, going for more fireworks later.
*sigh*
seems like its so obvious now.
oh well.
daaa.
peace.

2006-08-09T17:10:00.000+08:00

wheee.
had the best "eve of public holiday" yesterday.
:)
started off de day at 8 in the morning already in front of the com.
after dat went to proceed to school for the dfund lecture.
came in like 45 mins late, so in the end i didnt go.
seelah.
no matter how hard i try to go early, i still wont be able to make it on time.
i want a bike!!!
urgh.
anyways, after dat, slacked for abit in school.
was playing the street fighter with idris when she called.
so i went off to meet her, rushing ah, takot she reach first.
turns out i reach der first, and hadta wait for her for like 15mins.
sempat maen a few more games seh.
cheh.
niwaes, we went to cs first cos she wanna go montip.
after dat i went up 2nd floor buy socks, feet was hurtin.
den only we went to bugis.
had our late lunch at bk.
den went to arab st cos she wanted to buy the diy stuff for the waistbelt thingy.
walked and walked and walked til we were both kinda moody and tired.
called nina like a few times just to get the directions to the place.
wth sia.
kedai dahlah tkde name.
agaknye ah.
or i just didnt notice.
dunno ah.
whatever.
after dat, we went back to the mrt to go esplanade.
before dat we stopped by uncle's bike to buy ice-cream.
den slack by the road, taking pics, eating ice-cream.
quite a scene ey.
lol.
after dat went to city hall, saw janice esc in the toilet.
she was waiting for bf alone.
so we chatted for abit.
reached esplanade like 6 sumthing.
was kinda lost looking for the place.
the hiphop place ah.
tot dey were performing at waterfront bay seh.
den malek said, from der turn left.
so we did and we came to a bigggg stage.
like concert big.
haha.
den confident waited der, eat cupcorns, wheels/pretzels/dunno-whats-the-name.
den malek called to ask where were we.
turns out it was at the other end.
we were supposed to turn right.
waddehell seh.
malek, malek.
lol.
den we watched it for abit den got intervals.
so we went up to the bridge and sat der.
chilled for abit.
when we went back down, the crowd at the alley had grown.
dey were doing breakdancing at dat time.
and den another interval.
one hour interval.
wth.
so we went around again,with my feet already hurting.
den we fetched nina.
and we went hunting for a spot where we can enjoy the fireworks.
but the place was like so fuckin crowded.
didnt really enjoy it dat much, just like sat ah.
cos again, the trees were in the way.
and furthermore the alley was a distraction to me ah.
wanted to watch de performance but the girls wanted to enjoy the fireworks.
so again i hadta be their bodyguard.
nyeahahaha.
always happen to watch fireworks with 2 girls.
ape dah.
anyways, after dat immediately joined the crowd at the alley.
sesak siak.
was standing next to nina.
den der was this 2 guys behind us.
memekak siak.
naseb baek klakar ah.
but whatever, still dey were fuckin irritating.
after dat, another interval.
merepek kan.
toilet, popcorn, wheels/pretzels/dunno-whats-the name, ice cream and sat in a circle.
kinda like leaned on each other ah.
like Y.
heh.
den performance started.
freakyz on stage.
(im trying to contain my excitement, cos im like tryin to sound like im a guy in dis post.)
coolness.
he was aight.
den psyckelecticz.
i dunno how de hell u spell dat.
den we proceeded off.
her parents came to pick her up.
wanted to send me home but its okay.
dey dropped me off at dhobyghaut station.
went back, in the train saw fareez n frens.
aliff seh.
wth.
the las time i saw him was like during bangku sekolah.
der were 3 of dem.
dey called me over but i was shy.
(ok ni part dah nk kene jadik pompan balek.)
shy ah seh.
dey were like 3 person der.
one of dem aliff and one of dem cute guy.
den i didnt go over at first.
furthermore the train was packed.
i dun wish to go thru the trouble of langgar-ing ppl sume.
cos ive always hated how ppl langgar me.
urgh.
ok anyways, dey kept on looking over and askin me to cum over, and den fareez like pointed to one of dem (aliff or cute guy), and like hand-signaled to me like "call/phone" like konon nk mintak no lah.
so i got more paiseh.
der i was standing, alone msg-ing2.
den de getai girl n frens were standing next to me.
another bunch of dumb airheads.
"tadi richard nmpk aku tk tegor pon...ah tu freakyz! omgomgomg!"
cos dey were like watching the video dey took over at the alley.
kental siak.
so i decided to divert my attention to another direction.
and dengan tk sengaje terpandang mama-pundek-whose-eyes-were-begging-to-be-gourge-out.
ni baru motherfucker siak.
aku prasan ah he was like staring at me, dats why in the first place i was forced to turn to the left, where the airheads were.
den dah tkleh tahan, terlalu meluat tgk the getais, turned to the front den tertgk si mama pundek tu lagik.
den he was like licking his lips.
mailto:WTF?!!!!!!!@!!#@!$@$%@%^$%
KNNCCB.
den luckily dah smp yishun cos mmg i wanted to go over to dem when dah smp yishun.
dey kept on looking at my direction.
den evrytime dey looked over, i became shy, everytime i became shy, i smiled to myself, everytime i smile to myself, people look at me one kind.
so finally i spared myself from the freaky stares and went over.
dtg sane, satu2 terdiam.
den chatted for abit.
den dey made fun of my name jap.
abeh fareez ckp "eh dah ah, jgn ah...nanti die complain pat matair aku ah..."
lol.
dey alighted at admiralty.
i went down at woodlands cos i was meeting slenger and imp and syaf and ella.
civics mac dey were.
sat for a while and den went off our separate ways.
reached home at 1.15.
slept at 2, woke up at 5.
reached bedok in zombie mode.
heh.
thanks dear for the nice outing.
i'll see u on fri/sat if ali's not der again.
daa.
peace.

2006-08-08T09:17:00.000+08:00

its so peaceful goin online in the morning.
everyone's at school or sleepin.
so i dun haf any fuckers bothering me in msn.
waddehell.
there was this one guy who added me in msn some time back.
email add was: sin_da_bad
crap sak.
first time i saw him online, he tegor me.
"who da fuck is dis??"
i was kinda shocked at the rude intro, den i said.
"u added me. who are u?"
he said.
"i asked who de fuck is dis, not who added who. so tell me now."
den i was like wtf?!
"hello, i am "go fuck urself" if u wanna keep on talking like a motherfucker."
he wanna return the favour, so he said.
"if u dun like my attitude, u can call 1800-kiss-my-ass."
den i said, "ohh i sure will. thanks."
den ape ntah, ape ntah.
he said sumthing like "just because u think ure pretty, dun think dat im gonna talk nicely to u."
or sumthing like dat ah maksod nye.
den i said "who said dat im pretty? and who said dat im a girl?"
den he replied, "well i can tell from the way u talk. ur stupidity and*somethingsomething* shows from the way u talk."
den i didnt reply, malas nk layan.
i changed my nick to "go phuck urself, u phucker!"
den he tegor me again, "u may seem like u dun like talking to me, but U R"
i was lost, so i asked, "i am what?"
den he asked me to wait.
waddehell.
waited for awhile, nuthin happened.
den off i sent him to my rubbish bin.
waddefuck seh.
why are these online people picking fights with me??
urgh.
whatever lah.
just thinking back bout all this has made me lost my mood.
benci.
lol.
anyways, been wanting to update on saturday's outing with beep n mean.
but at first i tot, nanti ade jer ORANG ingat aku carik beep ngan mean skg, since dah tkde kwn.
but den i realized, why de fuck shud i care?

furthermore, why shud i bother to think wat other ppl think of my life.

its my pharkin life.

say what u wanna say, think wat u wanna think.

from what i noe, i didnt look for dem, dey asked me out to see the fireworks.
the only reason i didnt look for dem was because i noe beep was busy with attachments and stuff. and mean, TEP or sumthing ah.
ANYWAYS, went to esplanade last sat.
had fun.
i left my house ard 7.30 gitu.
met dem, and we were off to esplanade.
it was sooo pharkin packed!
like we hadta jalan berpusu2 to get closer to see the fireworks.
so we walked until we cannot walk nimore.
den the fireworks started, and i looked up.
all i could see is the fireworks being hidden by tall trees rite in front of us.
wtf.
den i got tired of watching the trees, beep n mean were like smangat watching dat thing.
i just stood behind dem, like their bodyguard.
nyeahahaha.
after dat we bergerak ah.
there was alot alot alot of "kids nowadays".
urgh.
beep n mean, says i look like one.
maybe cos of the way i dressed dat day.
i dunno.
we went to an end of the esplanade.
tot of looking for the marina south park or something.
but dey were malas like halfway there.
anyways, i wasnt really sure if we were going de rite way.
den we chilled at the side ah, one corner, by the railings ah.
took pics, chilled, took pics, chilled.
after dat we went to tmpt yg entrance to the esplanade, the one by the road.
sat at the stairs ah.
den i told dem what's happenening in my life.
like everything ah.
den after dat, tot wanna go have supper.
lau pa sat or wat.
but mean was like really late.
so we went back.
took the train to marina and bounced back to woodlands.
again, took pics, laff2, took pics, laff, shhh, took pics, den we got tired.
hahahha.
den beep went to bk to buy herself supper cos she waas starving.
from woodlands we took the cab home since mean was like "im-so-dead" late.
and i reached home like 12.30.
everyone was up cept my dad.
oh well.
had sweet wonderful fun time with the girls.
i gave beep a few advices.
and she was so sweet, she said "if u were in nyp, i wouldnt let dem do dat to u.."
thanks sweetie.
i'll never forget u guys lah k.
:)
peace.

2006-08-06T20:23:00.000+08:00

hah.
seems like people around me are having problems similar to mine.
wth ah.
today i was having an okay day.
at least a boring one.
dat was, until someone hadta piss me off.
see.
everything i predicted has happened.
everything i do or say is wrong.
i noe i am pharkin stoopid.
im jinxed.
what more do u want from me???
just enjoy urselves like how ure doin rite now.
u are happier without me, everyone is, i can tell.
and i am happier now.

at least if not happy, im at peace.

anyways, my company wont make any difference in the situation.

if anything it might just worsen the situation.
so, here come's my fave quote "dont bother"
and please lah.
dun tell me what to feel and dun ever tell me what to do.
what, am i supposed to do everything u say and ask me to?
u say u wanna help.
well here's sumthing to help me at.
help understand me.
u dun hafta ask me to noe how i feel.
im sure u have feelings, so all u hafta do is just sit n think.
just sit and think how would u feel if u were in my shoes.
dun just blame and accuse and instruct without thinking.
what de hell do u need me for?
im sure u'll be too busy now rite, wats wif projects and stuff.
so again, dun bother.
like u said, no one needs me, what else do u want from me???
or is this just u feeling bored, hence causing u to want to pick fights wif me?
is dis something u enjoi doing?
i dun think so.
well at least i hope not.
but seems like u do.
enjoying this, i mean.
maybe ure just trying to make better the situation, but heres an advice.
don't.
u dun wanna take the risks.
it may get into a bigger mess den it already is.
i never had a problem hanging out with u all.
at least i never wanted to.
i just felt like keeping myself shut and just spend more time wif myself.
is dat a sin???
wtf.
now i feel like i cant do anything right.
if i cant even keep quiet whenever i feel like it, den i say this really is too much.
its pharkin ridiculous ah.
its my pharkin life.
do i hafta ask ur permission if i wanna do anything at all??
ape siak.
dis is like wtf ah.
u noe, i never had a problem with u.
but suddenly, u created dis problem which came from i dunno where.
i think u are confused.
u think i am mad at u people.
u think i am still mad at her.
i tell u now, i am not.
the reason why i dun hang around with u all nimore is just because i dun want to.
cant i choose if i wanna hang out anot??
wtf.
if u think im treating u guys differently, think of how u are treating me.
maybe u dun realize it, but yea what u did hurt me a lil.
i just dun wanna say it cos i dun wanna make a big fuss out of it.
again, i dun wanna make this a bigger mess den it already is.
i tell u one thing eh.
if ure good to me, i'll be good to u at least twice in return.
if ure bad to me, i'll be worse den u at least 3 times in return.
actually i dun even noe why u, of all people, brought up the subject.
why??
u saw a change in my attitude towards u?
well.
one thing, it was because i didnt even see u dat much last week rite.
so wat do expect.
anyways, i could see dat u were busy with stuff, so i didnt wanna bother.
if u cud still remember, i even asked u along if u wanted to follow us watch movie.
but u said u got class, so okay ah.
lemme refresh u on wat happened last week.
mon: didnt see u in sch the whole day, but met u at tamp after school.
tues: i went to meet faz, left early so didnt get the chance to meet u. if not i'd get a nagging from her. at the end of the day, i went back to tamp but ur behaviour was intolerant so i just went like wtf. do u remember when we were at small mac, u gave me dat look? so i tot maybe he's just havin his temperaments. we made de effort to meet u all before we went back, but nina didnt reply, so we headed home.
wed: i hadta return to school bcos nobody told me about the access card thingy. u went out after dat.
thurs: u had ur fren over and went to itas. i did hang out with u all at itas for abit before my jap.
fri: again, i hadta leave school early to meet faz. i prefer not to get nagged. and i didnt follow u all to seoul garden cos i told u ppl im saving up to pay my bills. at least the movie is cheaper den seoul-gardening.
so who do u wanna blame now??
blame me for what, treatin u differently?
and please lah, dun gimme de pharkin crap of "aku carik faz bile dah tkde org laen pat sisi aku" ah.
i even told phuzz specifically "faz, ni mesti klau drg tau yg aku kluar ngan kau, mesti dey will think dat i went out with u because i haf nobody close to me nimore in school.."
but she only said jgn merepeklah, let dem think wat dey wanna think.
well, here's de fact.
she called me up on sun/mon and asked me to accompany her apply job at ikea.
i hadta be her temporary bf cos real one wasnt der.
so please get de facts right before u accuse people of stuff.
and when i told u dis, u didnt hafta turn the tables around and say dat "yelah, kau mane nak carik org, slalu org yg nk kene carik kau...".
wtf ah?!
u said it urself dat u all dun need me.
so, tell me why do i hafta sebok2 pat situ when im not needed?
u told me to live alone, so i guess i will.
u noe, i never wanted to "putuskan frenship" ni sume tau.
its like pharkin crappy and not to mention childish.
i only said i dun wanna get close to u all cos seems like de closer i am to u ppl, the more conflicts i get involved in.
i never told u to stop talking to me or pretend u dun noe me.
wth.
seriously ah.
u guys haf ur own life, just do whatever u want.
peace.

2006-08-05T16:55:00.000+08:00

its a saturday evening and beep's askin me out to see the fireworks.
i really dun feel like going out of the house.
but i wanna meet dem.
*sigh*
been having trouble at school, with frens.
or shud i call dem "friends".
sometimes, i guess who we take as frens are just not really "friends".
for the past week, ive been faced with alot of disappointments.
disappointments from my friends.
i wish not elaborate, but i feel like i have nuthin now.
i think im surviving.
i dunno.
peace.

2006-08-02T15:18:00.000+08:00

new blog for me here.

hello everyone.

im cherrymonstar.

peace.